ADD ADHD and Women Part 3 — ADD Tip o the Day 546

 This is good enough that I’m just copying, with permission, the whole thing:

from Lisa Timms MS Special Education

Attention Deficit Disorder can take several forms in children. It is not difficult to track the child with ADD who is very chaotic. Boys generally come into this category. But then there are some types of ADD which go undiagnosed because their effects in children are less outwardly evident. This happens mainly in case of girls.

There are many girls who are called “tomboys”. They frequently exhibit some of the important features off ADD, like being more involved in physical activities, but not as reckless as the boys themselves. As a result teachers and parents jump to the conclusion that the child has no interest in academics and is basically not organized, but the possibility of ADD is seldom considered.

Besides the “tomboy” types, the “chatty” girls could also be suffering from ADD, but remaining undiagnosed. This is a fusion of over-activity and inattentiveness, and is usually touted as socially extrovert. These girls are extremely talkative than being physically active and cannot stop talking even if they are strictly warned. They also cannot tell stories comprehensively and will stray from their thoughts because of ADD.

Those whom we call as “daydreamers” could also be suffering from ADD. They do not draw any attention to themselves and are very quite in nature. However, their too much being into themselves and not giving any attention to the class is another form of ADD, contrary to the “chatty” girls. They may show anxiety and depression when given school projects, but cannot finish the projects because of their lack of staying power. This generally goes undiagnosed because the child is thought to be lazy and, parents and teachers fail to identify the disorder in time.

What is fascinating is that many girls with ADD have quite a high rate of IQ and could be called “gifted”. When a child has a high IQ there are no problems in school work, but their lack loopholes get reflected as they mature into adults. Keep in mind that ADD is not a learning disorder, and patients do not inevitably are poor performers in school. Till high school they can be quite well off, but with mounting pressure and assignments symptoms may become more and more evident.

When undiagnosed, Attention Deficit Disorder may cause a lot of harm to an individual. Children will be called unorganized, lacking intelligence and lazy, when in truth, they might be silent sufferers of ADD. They will have very low esteem of themselves, and believe themselves to be quitters or stupid because of their problems. It is crucial that the problem is identifies and treated before it becomes too late and any long-term damage is done.

Many girls with ADD ADHD go undiagnosed, but we usually think of the inattentive ones, and not the rarer hyperactive ones. Also, many women get along okay until they have children, and then the extra responsibilities tip them over.


Bonus links:

Women’s symptoms of ADD ADHD get worse after puberty. from jeg

ADD,ADHD,adult ADD,adult ADHD,ADHD and women,ADHD and women,ADHD and girls,girls and ADD, female ADD,female ADHD, attention deficit,attention disorder

Sometimes I do talk too much!

ADD test for women    from jeg

Difference in ADD ADHD in boys and girls

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ADD ADHD and Marriage?- Is It Possible??? —ADD Tip o the Day 545

 Marriage Experts

I am not The Expert on ADD ADHD and marriage, that would be Melissa Orlov and Martha Puryear.  I do have some years in the field, but only from one side.  My expertise would be in How to Live With A Partner Who is Extremely Frustrated with You.

But that’s not the book I’m writing right now.


But you and your partner can identify the behaviors that are most frustrating for them, and can come up with strategies to make those go better.

I worked with one man whose marriage vastly improved when he found a way to get to dinner on time.  Mine improved when I learned how to stop losing my keys.


Ideally, your partner will help you work on the issues – help you devise a strategy, remind you when you forget, monitor things. I just have to remember that this is in the category of helping,  not bossing or criticizing.

The Book

A good first step, if you haven’t already done it, is to get Orlov’s book and you and your partner read and discuss it together. Take small steps.

Your life can be better, and so can theirs.                                                

add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,add and marriage,add and relationships,adhd and relationships,adhd and marriage

Just looking for a partner.



The ADHD Effect On Marriage- Orlov

Orlov’s new book – The Couples Guide to thriving with ADHD

melissa orlov great website on marriage link

great post marriage is for losers

the verbal cue

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ADD ADHD and Genes- an epigenetic viewpoint — ADD Tip o the day 544


Thought when I retired I’d take a genetics course, learn all about it. Hasn’t happened. Retirement is more time consuming than I ever imagined, and the change in scheduling  has still got me thrown off.

But I have read a little bit of interesting stuff on epigenetics.  This is a new exciting topic, moving beyond current genetics knowledge.


This refers to things that increase or decrease gene functioning.  They do not affect the genes themselves, don’t change the DNA sequencing.

This change in functioning can be related to environmental factors and experiences, and can be inherited. In this way, for example, an experience of the grandfather may have a significant effect on the grandchildren, even though it did not change his DNA. For example, if grandfather went through a famine, the grandchildren may be less likely to develop diabetes.


There’s a tendency to inheritance in ADD ADHD, with the classical story of the parents who bring their son in to be diagnosed and find that the father has it also.

But perhaps epigenetics bears on some of the controversies and prescriptions regarding ADD ADHD.  Epigenetic changes might be caused by stress, exercise, meditation,  diet, sleep patterns, etc.

The model for many medical conditions is that the person’s genes may give them an increased tendency to the condition, but whether they get it or not depends on what happens to them in their environment.

The good news

We don’t get to choose our genes, but we can affect how they affect us.


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It’s inherited.

  The link:  


Tips about genes:

Tip 1   Tip 2     Tip 3



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More on Diet and ADD ADHD —ADD Tip o the Day 543

We all have opinions 

We form our beliefs based on our feelings. Then we find data to support them, and ignore data that refutes them.

Fortunately, there is science.

This man seems to know what he’s talking about:

Stephen V. Faraone, Ph.D.


Stephen V. Faraone, Ph.D.

Distinguished Professor of Psychiatry, SUNY Upstate Medical University

More recent meta-analyses of omega-3 fatty acids suggest that they show some efficacy, about half as much as stimulant drugs. Those with a high EPA/DHA ratio seem to have the best effect. —

. Another way to look at these studies is using a standardized measure of treatment response effect where 0 means the treatment does not work and higher numbers are better. For stimulant drugs, the effect is 0.9, for food color restrictions it is about 0.5 and for other elimination diets it is about 0.4. Because most of the food color studies focused on kids with high levels of food colorant intake, the overall effect is smaller. Also, removing food colorants from kids with high levels gives a statistically reliable effect (i.e., we can believe it). The effect for other elimination diets is not reliable. A key issue is that the elimination diets are not easy to implement.

On human nature

It is hard for us to examine our beliefs and assumptions, and harder even to change them.

It is hard for me to accept that food coloring may play a part in ADD ADHD in some children.


add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention,deficit,strategies

Who really knows what’s in there?

reason, logic, or emotions?   – excellent discussion

 on food additives

other viewpoints on foods

homey on using a notebook for a planner

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No Time to Think, Too Busy, Frantic, Overloaded — ADD Tip o the Day 542

The New York Times

The New York Times took some time off from bashing ADD, ADHD, Ritalin and the other medications to print this article, which explains a lot.


We make ourselves busy so we can avoid feelings or problems. We don’t want to think or feel.


We are faced with too many choices– too many channels, too many apps, too many devices, too many events, – – –.

Every time we make a choice,we use up a little willpower, which some of us didn’t have a whole lot of to begin with.


Busy is an attitude. If we focus on one thing,  do that, then focus on another one thing, we don’t have to feel busy. It’s our infinitely long to do list in our head that causes the feeling.



Here’s the article:

no time to think

Bonus link

from laura stoker: understand your ADD ADHD

add,adhd,adult adhd,adult add,attention deficit,New York Times,strategies

consider the lilies of the field. okay, so it’s not a lily, still-


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How to function with ADD ADHD – ADD Tip o the Day 541

Coping and functioning

Isn’t that what we try to do? So if we have ADD ADHD we try to cope with it. We can’t cure it, but we can treat the symptoms, and we can use strategies to cope. And our life can be better.

Is there a treatment?

This is controversial.  The medications-Ritalin, Adderall, Strattera, Vyvanse, etc. – help the symptoms for most of us. They make us more able to utilize the strategies to cope and therefore to improve our functioning.

Making things better

Improving our sleep, our diet, and our exercise will help our ADD ADHD. These are keys to health, not treatment.

Recognize and acknowledge

Once we recognize that we have ADD ADHD, we can begin to identify the specific problems it causes us.  We can make strategies to help us cope with those. We can consider treatments for the condition. We can decide to improve our habits, which will help.

Our life can be better.


from Dr. Prevatt  this is like a summary of my tips

Bonus link o the Day:

Myths abut ADD ADHD from Melissa

Bonus comment o the Day

from Bryan Hutchinson on his great web site:

Please remember that when discussing medication and / or supplements each member is responsible for his or her comments. Each person’s experiences may be different and no one should make any changes or try anything new with regard to medication or supplements without talking to his or her doctor first.

Bryan’s site Adderworld

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Some days it’s just too much.



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How can you tell if they know about ADD ADHD? — ADD Tip o the Day 540

Finding a knowledgeable professional – a followup

Hard to do.  Lots of misinformed people, including professionals.  Other things can mimic ADD ADHD. I assume most ADD ADHD certified coaches know what they’re doing.

Good suggestions:

From mike: look them up on the net.  Are they reviewed?  Have they published? Does someone else refer to them in a book or other place?

Check with CHADD or other ADD ADHD organizations.

Someone else made another good suggestion but I’ve lost it!  Can you repeat it?

Who knows about sensory processing disorder (SPD)?

How do you distinguish it from ADD ADHD? Do I have both, or is my hypersensitivity just part of my ADD?

I’m not sure about this:  on sensory processing  disorder

previous posts:

on finding a professional                                                                                

ADD,ADHD,adult ADD,adult ADHD,attention deficit,sensory,ADD evaluation,ADHD evaluation,ADD coach


on hypersensitivity

on evaluations

Bonus link:

From Linda – good tip on how to change your life

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