Category Archives: relationships

ADHD and Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria

Sometimes you don’t see something that’s right in front of your eyes; at least I don’t. Rejection sensitivity dysphoria is a hot topic. It’s been found as another part of ADHD, like irritability (not in DSM, not part of the … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, adhd and marriage, adhd and relationships, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, attitudes, dysfunctions, marriage, rejection, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Taking It Easy? — ADHD Tip O the Day 996

An ADHD Strategy: When you need to get something done but can’t dig up the energy, see if you can find an easy way out. Here’s a bunch of quotes for today. “Your first step is just that: the first … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, adhd and marriage, adhd and relationships, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, marriage, relationships, tips | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Marriage/relationships and ADHD follow up — ADHD Tip O the Day 994

Relationships are very complicated, especially if someone has ADHD I love pens. I have a lot of pens. My wife says I hoard pens. She says I should go through all of my pens and throw away the ones that … Continue reading

Posted in add, adhd, adhd and marriage, adhd and relationships, clutter, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Constructive Arguing— ADHD Tip O Day 990

Constructive Arguing: Arguments are a normal and unavoidable part of almost all marriages (intimate relationships).  The trick is to make them productive instead of destructive, and to have them not too often nor too intensively, and to get over them … Continue reading

Posted in adhd, adhd and marriage, adhd and relationships, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Many ADHD Links, Many Choices — ADHD Tip O the 981

  We ADHD ers have difficulty making choices. I’ve collected too many links, so I’m going to dump them now.  You pick and choose.  It’s up to you now. Doug Links:   Outgrow ADHD?   Ages and stages of ADHD … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, adhd and marriage, adhd controversies, ADHD problems, adhd science, ADHD strategies, controversies, controversy, dysfunctions, marriage, medication, medication, medicine, relationships, research, science, stimulants, tips | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Keep It Short — ADHD Tip O the Day 955

My astute wife said the last ADHD post was too long.  So this one will be short. Strategy O the Day: Listen to your wife. doug Links: ADHD and Relationships ADHD and Relationships more Webinars Quotes O the Day: “The … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD strategies, adhd, adhd and marriage, ADHD strategies, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

ADHD Excuses — ADHD Tip O the Day 947

We ADHDers are hard to live with.  We cause a lot of frustration. A comment from T: “I would love for you to address the issue with people with ADHD trying to justify behavior that is driven by the ADHD … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

ADHD Emotions Part 3— ADHD Tip O the Day 923

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria as a part of  ADHD Do I have RSD?  I don’t know.  I reread the article, it says usually the crashes just last for hours, mine last a day or two. Still, I’m certainly overly sensitive and … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd controversies, ADHD problems, controversies, controversy, controversy, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships, science | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

ADHD Emotions, Part Two — ADHD Tip O the Day 922

“Rejection sensitive dysphoria is not a formal diagnosis, but rather one of the most common and disruptive manifestations of emotional dysregulation — a common but under-researched and oft-misunderstood symptom of ADHD, particularly in adults.” I read this article and dismissed … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADHD problems, dysfunctions, educate yourself, relationships, research, science | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

“It Just Got Away From Me” — ADHD Tip O the Day 891

ADHD is a booger Mon 2/17/2020 11:36 AM What I’m about to tell you is true. This is the way it really happened. You can’t make this stuff up. We were to leave for our trip on Thursday. We’d spend … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, distraction, dysfunctions, marriage, procrastination, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

A Day with ADHD — ADHD Tip O the Day 869

What is a typical day with ADHD like? Here’s an example of how I spend my time: Trying to find my glasses:  20 minutes Trying to find my i phone, twice: 45 minutes Trying to find the thing that was … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

ADHD and Screens — ADHD Tip O the Day 854

ADHD Book Review?? I got a negative review of Living Daily with Adult ADD or ADHD.  Well, kinda.  Starfish had not read the book, nor  had she bought it. So it wasn’t really a review; it was a complaint, a … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADHD problems, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

JADE and ADHD —- ADHD Tip O the Day 850

Ram, who is a great contributor to the ADHD blog, has written about the difficulties of dealing with family.  I couldn’t refrain from offering some advice: “Ram Families are truly difficult. Ignorance makes it even worse. You need to manage … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, attitudes, controversy, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Jennie on Understanding People with ADHD — ADHD Tip O the Day 823

I asked Jennie to do a guest ADHD post and she really came through: If Only You Could See in ADHD I began ADHD Coaching after learning of my sister’s diagnosis. Let me start by explaining that indeed, she and … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, educate yourself, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

“You Don’t Listen to Me!” — ADHD Tip O the Day 816

Have you ever heard that? Miscommunication is a standard part of normal human life. So is the frustration with it.  But who ever said that ADHD is normal human life?  So we have a lot more of it. Feeling not … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, marriage, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Ouch! Hypersensitivity and ADHD – – – Tip O the Day 809

I know I am hypersensitive. Am I hypersensitive as a symptom of my ADHD? Or have my ADHD problems, including so many screw ups, just made my self-esteem fragile? So is the hypersensitivity an ADHD symptom or a consequence? I … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, attitudes, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

ADHD, Listening, Hearing, Oh,my — ADHD Tip O the Day 800

“You just don’t listen to me!” Have you ever heard that?  If you have, then does that mean you were listening? Yes, I was listening to you.  I could repeat every word you said.  But that doesn’t necessarily mean I … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, distraction, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

ADHD and the Challenge of Relationships — ADHD Tip O the Day 795

If you think living with ADHD is a challenge, imagine what it’s like living with someone with ADHD. I started to add, “And imagine what it’s like to live with someone who is living with someone who is living with … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Life With ADHD. Oh, My! — ADHD Tip O the Day 787

With ADHD, I need a wife, an iPhone, and strategies. I had an 8:30 breakfast appointment with my boss at an excellent restaurant. And he was paying. I set the alarm; it worked. I got up on time, got ready … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Back again with ADHD — ADHD Tip O the Day 769

 Does this really have anything to do with ADHD? I’m back.  Sorta.  Swamped.  So here’s some of my favorite clips.  I’m hoping that you will: 1. watch them. 2. enjoy them. 3.  leave a comment on the question, “What do … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, distraction, dysfunctions, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

ADHD and Relationships – A Followup— ADHD Tip O the Day 768

What are ADHDers like?  What is it like to live with ADHD? What is it like to live with someone with ADHD? And why are relationships so difficult for ADHDers?  If you would like to understand, this article from Attitude … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Myths and What It’s Like to Live with ADHD — ADHD Tip O the Day 767

  Some People Still Do Not Understand ADHD There are climate change deniers, and flat earthers, and anti-vacine conspiracy theorists, and there are still many people who just do not understand ADHD. It does no good to get mad at … Continue reading

Posted in add, adhd, attitudes, controversy, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

ADHD and Relationships. Is it possible? — ADHD Tip O the Day 766

My long suffering wife  (very, very long) still gets annoyed sometimes when I do ADHD stuff.  For one example, of many, calling her to come help and then doing something to get ready while she’s standing there waiting. I’m trying … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Five Disconcerting Facts, Relevant To But Not Limited To ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 759

Disconcerting Facts: 1. Our decisions are made unconsciously, based on unconscious factors, mostly emotional.  After a decision is made, we think we “decide.”  Then we come up with “facts” to support our decision and make it appear to be rational. 2. … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, controversies, controversy, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

It’s Christmas/Hanuka/Holiday Season -A challenge with ADHD — ADHD Tip O the Day 758

The Holidays are supposed to be Joyful But with ADHD, they can be just extra challenging. Did you procrastinate on getting the gifts or the cards? Does the prospect of  making choices and decisions terrify you? Are you having trouble … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, organize, procrastination, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Caring for Someone With ADHD (ambiguous title). Affection or caretaking?— ADHD Tip O the Day 742

Life Is Hard Life is hard.  Life with ADHD is harder.  Marriage is hard.  Marriage with ADHD is harder.  Being married to someone with ADHD is harder than I can even imagine. There are strategies that will make our life with … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Tips for Surviving with ADD ADHD — ADD Tip o the Day 730

What can we expect of ourselves, or of someone else, with ADHD? “Life can be hard, and with ADHD, it’s even harder.” “Some days, just surviving is a triumph.”             Doug Puryear The great cell … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, marriage, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

ADHD Makes Me Irritable — ADHD Tip O the Day 722

Irritability is one of the many symptoms of ADHD. Trust me on this. From a big article on ADHD: Wender (1998) provided a list of adult behaviours linked to childhood ADHD (see also Weiss & Murray, 2003; Asherson, 2005). Motor … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, attitudes, dysfunctions, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

Mother’s Day and ADHD, or, Living with an ADHDer —ADD Tip O the Day 715

With ADHD, Nothing Is Easy Hope you had a great Mother’s Day, whether you’re a mother or not.  You deserve it. I took Martha, the mother of my kids, and Laura, the mother of my grandson, to a nice restaurant.  … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Does ADHD get you bullied? Criticized? Misunderstood? —ADHD Tip O the Day 713

Who gets bullied? Kids who are different.  That would be us, ADHD. But also kids with autism spectrum disorder (autism, Asbergers), dyslexia and other learning disabilities, physical handicaps, or different physical appearance. And also, any minority, in any group. And also, … Continue reading

Posted in ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

ADD ADHD Symptoms and Some of the Many Ways They Can Mess Up Your Life — ADD Tip O the Day 674

Examples of various ADD ADHD symptoms and their bad effects One of our major symptoms is impulsiveness.  That leads to blurting out inappropriately.   It also leads to  making snap judgments of people, but that’s common with vanillas, too. And we have trouble controlling … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Too Much, Too Much, Too Much — ADD Tip O the Day 670

Sometimes with my ADD ADHD, I can’t think straight, or even walk straight.  Sometimes it’s all too much. I was going to the library. It was a nice day. I was going to walk. Since I was going out, my … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Rules Can Make Your Life Better with ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 649

Using Rules: A major principle for coping with ADD ADHD is:  identify a problem, design a strategy, make it a rule, make it a habit.  But with ADD ADHD there are other uses for rules . Some of us do … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

Relationships, Including Marriage, and ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 636

For ease, I’ll talk about marriage  but this applies to all intimate relationships. Things they don’t tell you Marriage is hard work. Especially if one of you has ADD ADHD. Quote O the Day The only thing worse than being … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

ADD ADHD and Marriage or Similar Relationships — ADD Tip O the Day 629

With ADD ADHD, Relationships Are Hard In older couples, the divorce rate is twice that of vanillas.  According to Melissa Orlov, the major problem is undiagnosed and untreated ADD ADHD. Quote O the Day: “You have to be a superwoman … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

What Having ADD ADHD Is Like — ADD Tip O the Day 622

Living With ADD ADHD One of the painful things about having ADD ADHD is that people who don’t have it can’t understand what it’s like.  They may recognize some of the symptoms and problems and they may know what it’s … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, controversies, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

ADD ADHD and Dyscoordination — ADD Tip O the Day 619

Clumsy, Clumsy, Clumsy – Is It ADD ADHD? I reached for the glass, and… – I reached too far and I knocked it over. – I didn’t notice the glass between it and me and I knocked it over. – … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, medication, relationships, science, stimulants, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

ADD ADHD Poem —ADD Tip O the Day 593

Ode of an ADDer to a neat wife Please don’t put my stuff away. Please don’t move it, just let it lay. If I can’t see it, it doesn’t exist. I’ll forget to do something and we’ll both be pissed. … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, clutter, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Why Valentines Day Is important With ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 586

Valentines Day is February 14, this Saturday, that’s this coming Saturday, two days off, this Saturday, day after tomorrow. With ADD ADHD: 1. We forget all about it. 2. We think it’s a long way off and don’t buy a … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

ADD ADHD and Marriage?- Is It Possible??? —ADD Tip o the Day 545

 Marriage Experts I am not The Expert on ADD ADHD and marriage, that would be Melissa Orlov and Martha Puryear.  I do have some years in the field, but only from one side.  My expertise would be in How to … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, marriage, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , | 7 Comments

My Wife Complains – – – ADD Tip O the Day 530

My wife told me this morning that I’m very difficult to  live with.      I have no reason to doubt her.  She’s  unhappy because I got lost walking in the neighborhood the other day and she was concerned about me. … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Do You Know the Principles of Humanity? — ADD Tip o the Day 522

PRINCIPLES OF HUMANITY 1. If we struggle and struggle with a problem, and finally find something we can do that works, the next thing we will do is stop doing it. 2. People will choose up sides, and make it … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, attitudes, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Blurting Out — ADD Tip o the Day 511

We with ADD or ADHD have problems with blurting out; for example, saying the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time. “Aside from that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play?” Here’s some guidance on how … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Increase Self Control — ADD Tip o the Day 495

Ritalin May Increase Self Control If it does, this would presumably apply also to the other stimulants, Adderall, etc, as well as possibly to Straterra. This could be another hole poked in my belief that these medications do not help … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, controversies, educate yourself, medication, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Happy Valentines Day, to Everyone Who Loves Someone with ADD or ADHD — ADD Tip o the Day 468

My wife has stuck with me with my ADD all these years.  OK, she has had some complaints sometimes, but she has been very helpful.  I couldn’t have made it without her. She picks up a lot of the slack, … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD strategies, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

How to Use Cards, etc, for ADD ADHD — ADD Tip o the Day 460

Momma has suggested more details about using cards, lists, small steps and priorities for adult ADD ADHD.  And some other questions. This will take a few posts. CARDS: the red card, list of five, things to be attempted today. Limit … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

ADD and relationships — ADD Tip o the Day 448

I am reminded almost daily how hard it is to live with someone with ADD ADHD.               Ok, daily. So i just asked my wife if she would do a guest post on the … Continue reading

Posted in add, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments