Merry Christmas, or Whatever — ADD Tip O the Day 680

First, things have been a little rocky and a little more chaotic than the usual ADD ADHD life, and I am a little behind. BUT

Michael is home! after more than 2 weeks in ICU. Thank you everyone for your prayers and support.  AND

A blessed Christmas to each of you, and if Christmas is not your thing, then I hope Dec. 25 goes great for you, and if  you have another holiday of choice, then I hope it is blessed too.

Just read an article by W. M. Dodson, MD, about the stimulants.  Hope to post on it soon.  He is an ADD ADHD expert, who gave me the

Quote O the Day

‘The purpose of the stimulants is to help you focus enough to use the strategies.’

Note O the Day

I know this post is not up to par, hope to do better next time.  I am also struggling to develop  another website, The Bully.


#ADD #ADHD @dougmkpdp @addstrats

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Life can be hard. With ADD ADHD, it’s harder.

Posted in add, ADD strategies, adhd, medication, medicine, stimulants, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Sleep, and Health, and ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 679

Inadequate sleep makes ADD ADHD worse

I’m a little more disorganized than usual, thus so is this post.  Probably because I didn’t get enough sleep last night.

Sleep is of fundamental importance to our health and well-being, but even more so with ADD ADHD.  Our symptoms become  worse if we don’t get enough sleep.

Sleep hygiene can be very helpful, but most people don’t want to hear about it.  Most of us just want a pill.  I put links for sleep hygiene below.

I use melatonin at bedtime.  It’s “natural,”for whatever that’s worth. And unless I take it in the middle of the night, there is no hangover.  I believe in doing whatever we need to do in order to get our sleep.  Ambien (zolpidem) works well for most people, although not for me.

Stimulant medications

Daytrana and other stimulants (Adderall, Ritalin, amphetamines) can be very helpful for ADD ADHD symptoms, but can keep us awake at night unless we managed the dosage and the timing carefully.  I need to take my Daytrana patch off by 1:30 PM or I will have insomnia.  I use the alarm on my cell phone. It’s set for 1:20 and again for 1:30 – because I don’t always take it off the first time.

The big secret tip about sleep

Get up.

That’s it.  Get up.

If you’re not asleep in 15-20 minutes, or if you wake up in the middle of the night and can’t get back to sleep, just get up. Do something not too stimulating until you feel sleepy; then go back to bed.  Repeat as necessary.  There is nothing more guaranteed to keep you awake than trying to go to sleep.  And few things more miserable.

And lying in bed struggling to sleep will condition your brain that the bed is not a place to sleep.

(When do you think I write all these posts?)


Sleep hygiene

Sleep hygiene 2

Great Note O the Day:

Michael is doing very well and is supposed to be coming home Monday.  Thank God.

#add #adhd #sleep @dougmkpdp @addstrategies @adhdstrategies
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—that knits the raveled sleeve —. Boy, are my sleeves raveled!

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, attitudes, dysfunctions, educate yourself, medication, medicine, science, stimulants | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

The Free Secret of Weight Loss, Even with ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 678

The Secret to Weight Loss

OK, I won’t keep you in suspense any longer, here’s the secret:

We are blessed with a wonderful salad bar, with  decent mixed greens and all kinds of accompaniments.  My favorites are olives, mushrooms, celery, and cucumbers.  But there’s lots of other stuff, too, like broccoli (ugh!) and beets (ugh again) for people who like that kind of stuff.  And a wide choice of dressings.

So here’s the secret. It’s an issue of attitude.  I started thinking of salad as the main course, and small portions of anything else as side dishes.  And I eat the salad first.

That’s the big tip, right there.  The salad is the main course.

Smaller Tips

I didn’t cut out desserts. It doesn’t help to feel deprived. But I only have the ones that are especially appealing, maybe one a week. And I take a very small portion, which usually satisfies me. And after a desertless meal,  I often eat one square of very dark chocolate. Dark chocolate is  an exception to the rule that anything you like is bad for you. It’s one of the few things where I can eat just one and be satisfied. Of course, I don’t really eat it. I let it dissolve in my mouth, so it lasts a long time.

I cut down on alcohol. And I switched from Scotch to red wine.  I thought it had fewer calories, but researched it just now, for your edification, and it’s actually about the same. 

I changed my exercise routine to include high intensity training. This is supposed to be more effective while taking a less time. I love saving time.

I’m drinking  lots of glasses of ice water.

I don’t know if any of these smaller tips have made any difference, but the overall program is working, so I’m sticking to it.

The Other Big Secret

The other secret is that it’s not really so much about losing weight. That’s the easy part. It’s about keeping it off after it’s lost. That means I’ll need to stick with this program forever.  It’s a program, not a diet.  Have I mentioned that diets do not work?

And the secret within this secret is that I enjoy the program. I do not feel deprived or burdened or unsatisfied.  I enjoy the food and the exercise.  And as I’ve noticed before, once I’ve lost weight, I rarely feel hungry.  


Note O the Day:

Michael is still in ICU but much better. Off the ventilator.  Needs lung treatments.  Hoping to go home next Wednesday.  Thank you for your prayers and kind thoughts.

Joke O the Day (especially for Scott):  (this may be a repeat?)

Knock, knock.

           Who’s there?

Control freak.  Now you say, “Control freak who?”


Did I mention that with my ADD ADHD I don’t have much willpower?

So I’m using the strategy of “locked in.”  By telling you all about this, I’ll have to confess if I mess up or it doesn’t work.  That fact helps lock me into the program.



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It shouldn’t be so hard to lose weight.






@addstrategies #adhd #add @dougmkpdp

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, attitudes, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Your Weight and ADD ADHD — ADD Tip o the Day 677

Losing Weight, Even With ADD ADHD

I’m an expert on losing weight.  I’ve lost hundreds of pounds.

I’m also an expert in putting pounds back on.  Done that, too.

If I work really hard at it, I can lose a pound in a week.  That would be 52 pounds in a year!

With no effort at all, I can gain five pounds in one evening.

But I think I’m onto something now.  Have lost 17 pounds in several months and so far haven’t put it back on.  I’ll share my secret, but first, I have to tell you –

Diets don’t work. 

Diets do not work.  Sometimes people do lose weight on a diet, but also, inevitably, they regain more than they lost.  Because – diets do not work.

As you very well know, what works is to change your eating habits and your lifestyle.  Permanently.  You know that, you just didn’t want to hear it again.

We live in El Castillo, a wonderful place, and they feed us very well.  Extensive menu, good choices, good food.  Great multi choice desert table   –    I gained ten pounds in our first three months here.  Wasn’t sure which of the six choices was the best, so I had to try all of them.  Plus the frozen yogurt or ice cream after, which of course didn’t count.  One of the features of ADD ADHD is a lack of will power, have you noticed?  I mean, it was sitting right out there in front of me.


So, my secret next time.


Bonus Link

Sentences that can change your life from J Kansara

NOTE:  Michael is still in ICU but off the ventilator and seems to be doing well.  Thank you all for your prayers and support.

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El Castillo Desert Table

Oh, my!


@addstrategies  #adhd  #add  @dougmkpdp
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More Things You Can Do To Be Healthy In Spite of ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 676

The Four Most Important Things You Can Do For Yourself,                           Repeated  From the Previous Post, Because They Are So Important

 (in order of importance)

  1. Stop smoking   2. Exercise   3. Meditate   4. Omega-3 fatty acid    5. get enough sleep

Vicki commented that sleep belongs on this list, so now there’s five – I promoted it from the list below.  Thank you , Vicki.

Other Ways To Help Yourself

But here are many other ways, not in any particular order importance:

Stop drinking any sodas.

Watch the quality and quantity of what you eat.

Minimize contact with toxic people.

Minimize stress and have ways to cope with the unavoidable part (exercise, meditation, therapy, hobbies, etc.)

Get out of doors.


Help others.


Make strategies to cope with problems.

Moderate alcohol intake (isn’t this both a verb and an adjective?  That would work.)

Exercise your mind.

Be kind to yourself; minimize self-criticism.

Set realistic goals, not excessive expectations.

Practice awareness; pay attention to what’s going on, face your problems and deal with them.

For many people, a short mid-afternoon nap is helpful, if it doesn’t interfere with night time sleep.

For many people, small healthy between meal snacks are helpful.

Get help when needed. You don’t have to do it all by yourself.  Getting help is not a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength (I suspect this comment is aimed mostly at men?) 

Important Note O the Day:

Many of these healthy tips are also specifically helpful for ADD ADHD.


Please share, which of these are you doing, and which ones not?

What can you add to this list?


#add #adhd @dougmkpdp @addstrategies @adhdstrategies

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Four Ways To Be Healthy, Psychologically and Physically, Even With ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 675


Staying Healthy Isn’t Really That Hard 

 Here’s the four most important things you can do for yourself (and for your family), in order of importance.  ADD ADHD makes it harder, but you can be healthy.

  1. Stop smoking.
  2. Exercise.
  3. Meditate (yoga, tai chi, prayer, mindfulness, etc.).
  4. Omega-3 fatty acid daily (be sure the label shows more EPA than DHA).

See, that’s not so hard.  But with ADD ADHD, you’ll need strategies to help you stick with it.

There are many other things you can do to promote your physical and psychological well-being, but these are the most important four.  I’ll list some of the others in the next post. 


Bonus Link:

57 lose weight tips – very good!

Joke O the Day:

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Control freak, now you say “control freak who?”

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Is exercise a dirty word?                                        Find something you like, not a horrible chore.

Posted in add | 6 Comments

ADD ADHD Symptoms and Some of the Many Ways They Can Mess Up Your Life — ADD Tip O the Day 674

Examples of various ADD ADHD symptoms and their bad effects

One of our major symptoms is impulsiveness.  That leads to blurting out inappropriately.   It also leads to  making snap judgments of people, but that’s common with vanillas, too.

And we have trouble controlling our emotions.  On rare occasions, I get a brief high, feeling very good, almost silly, and get carried away with myself.  I’m pretty sure I’m not bipolar.

When I was a kid,  I was in that high state after we won a football game, feeling like a million dollars, ten feet tall.  A bowling game wouldn’t work and wouldn’t give me my quarter back, so I stole the disc.  That wasn’t like me at all.  Got in trouble.

As an adult, I was to be honored at a meeting, and was on a high.  I met a woman I liked who was in a position to be very helpful to me.  I asked her a very stupid silly joking question and lost any chance of further connection with her.

Similarly,  another woman I liked, and who could be helpful, started telling me of a painful situation she was in.  I wasn’t high, but I took the opportunity to pour out part of my sad story, on and on.  That was the end of the friendship.

I was introduced to a new addition to our family.  He made a really stupid inappropriate comment.  I wrote him off as a big jerk.  But over time, I got to know him better, and it turns out, he is a big jerk.

I was introduced to another guy, and he made a really stupid inappropriate comment. I wrote him off as a big jerk.  Much later, I was required to do some work with him.  I dreaded it.  It turns out, he’s an extremely nice guy.

We have trouble with social skills and relationships

No wonder!


  1.  I need to note when I’m in a high.  I need to recognize it’s a red flag, and  to be careful of what I do or say.  Fortunately, it’s not often.
  2. Similarly, making a snap judgement of someone is a red flag.  I need to not immediately write them off.

Hope you had a blessed Thanksgiving.                                     

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You say I’m socially inappropriate?                What’s this “inappropriate” sh–?


Bonus Link

Niall’s take on ADD ADHD symptoms, especially memory problems and their consequences

#add #adhd #adultadhd @dougmkpdp


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Irritability and ADD ADHD— ADD Tip O the Day 673

This is a question I use often to help with my ADD ADHD irritability problem:

                                     Does it really matter?

Often the answer is, No, it really doesn’t matter.

Right now, our grandson Michael, 13, is in ICU with pneumonia.  He’s on a ventilator.  He is getting a little better.

That changes my whole perspective on what matters and what doesn’t.  Very little matters.

I would appreciate your prayers for Michael.

thank you


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The sky is large. We are small.

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, attitudes, dysfunctions, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 15 Comments

Comments About ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 672

I keep worrying that you may not read the comments.  If you don’t, you’re missing a lot.  Here are some fine examples:

Homey– — I’ve been enjoying the pomodoro technique of time management. I only do something for 25 minutes and then I do something else. I know I’ll get to everything eventually but I can pick one thing for now and then do something else. Otherwise I’m the same as you – paralyzed and overwhelmed!!!

The pomodoro technique is great.  Uses a timer.  So I can do this task which I dread because I know it’s only for 25 minutes.  And I remind myself that I survived the army for two years, so 25 minutes of hell is nothing.  doug

Betsy – Here is my new way to handle tax preparation. I am behind by more than one year. I can not get it sorted. I have all the information I need but I cannot get it to the accountant in any form. I asked her to please send me, by email, a list of three things she needs as she assembles the information. When she sends me the list of three, I send her what she needs. Then, she sends me a new list.

Sometimes the list is easy, like looking up numbers; sometimes it is hard, like figuring out my office P and L for a calendar year. Or scanning a 1099 into my computer and emailing it to her.

But three are do-able. She just waits until she has the three things. No reminders, no admonitions, her mailbox is open to me and when I get the three things ready, I send them.

There is no way in the world that eventually the tax returns will not get done. And I will continue to do them this way forever and not be behind.

This is a brilliant application of the strategy, break it into small steps.  So you don’t need to think, “I have to do my taxes.” You just think “I need to add up the office checks.”  doug

Scott -I have lists of what needs to be done, projects I would like to do if I have extra time, a work list, a “today” list, and even a “project security list” where I put all of the projects so I don’t have to look at them on my normal list until I choose to put them there, when I am ready to start doing them.

It seems complicated, but it is working more and more. I used to just spin and wonder why even though I thought I was busy I wasn’t getting the right things done. I’m finding shorter lists work better for me, so sometimes just choosing a couple of things off the bigger list and writing them down on a short list really helps. That is basically from Doug’s book.

This is like my long to-do list, my short to-do list, and my list of five.  But Scott’s brilliant approach is putting the projects on a separate list, so you don’t have to be see them when you look at your other lists.  Then when you decide to tackle one of the projects, remember to break it into small steps. doug

Thank you to all you contributors.  I love the comments.


Bonus Link O the Day:

Homey – By the way, I started a new blog called I’ll be posting whenever I want and about whatever I want – mainly stuff that happens in my crazy life – definitely ADHD related things.

I hope you had a blessed and healthy Thanksgiving.  More coming on “healthy.”  Watch for it.  doug

@adhdstrategies @dougmkpdp #add #adhd
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Happens to me all the ti 

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, distraction, dysfunctions, organize, procrastination, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Best Jobs for People with ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 671

What is the best job for someone with ADD ADHD?

I recently worked in a state hospital.  It was great.

The staff was excellent, the building was good, the work was rewarding.

But none of that has to do with ADD ADHD.  It was a just right job for me, because:

It had structure: I was supposed to be there at 8:00 AM and leave at 5:00 PM (although it never happened).  Had a meeting every morning at 9:00 AM, and an every Tuesday meeting at 10:00 AM.

It was variable:  Different things were happening every day, plus sometimes I was getting new patients.  The patients were each unique.

It was personally interesting: I enjoyed helping the patients, working with the staff, and learning new things.

It was novel: I hadn’t worked in a state hospital before, the patients were new to me, and I was learning new medicines.

It was challenging: Oh, boy, was it challenging.

There was an immediate heavy deadline:  The only drawback was the paper work.  Ugh!  But I had to get it done on time and the deadlines were never far away. And the paperwork was novel and challenging, if not personally interesting.  I became much more efficient with time and it wasn’t a burden anymore.  

And I had to get to know the patients right away in order to do my job.

And The Point Is:

  1.  With ADD ADHD, we need structure, and we also need variation.
  2. Our focus centers do not turn on just because something is important.  They turn on if something is of personal interest, novel, challenging, or has an immediate heavy deadline.

What is the best kind of job for someone with ADD ADHD?

That question is asked often.  I just answered it.  If you are considering a job, these are the points you need to look at.

PS It also helped that I was part of a team and people were suggesting to me what needed to be done next and reminding me of the meetings I needed to go to.  It also helped that I didn’t really have a “boss”.  I don’t do well with close supervision.


Bonus Link O the Day

Forty neat little tips ( I would call most of them strategies).

PS PS Happy Thanksgiving to each of you.

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I do better without a “boss.”











@dougmkpdp @addstrategies @adhdstrategies #add #adhd #adultADHD

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Too Much, Too Much, Too Much — ADD Tip O the Day 670

Sometimes with my ADD ADHD, I can’t think straight, or even walk straight.  Sometimes it’s all too much.

I was going to the library. It was a nice day. I was going to walk.

Since I was going out, my wife wanted me to take the old newspapers to the trash bin. And on my way, to also take the filled water bottles back to my car. And while I was there, get the empty water bottles out of her car, and also check to see if the scarf I lost yesterday was in there.  And bring  the water bottles back to the apartment, and the lost scarf, if I found it.

Arrggghhhhh!  My head was spinning and my brain was about to explode.

But I did it! And I didn’t even get lost on the way.

And I did find the scarf.

I have strategies.

 Strategy 1.  It would have been smart to just stop and write it all down, but that would’ve felt silly and it would’ve required enough patience to stop and actually do it.

Strategy 2.  So I just kept saying it over and over to myself: trash, my car bottles, her car bottles, scarf.  That seemed to help; the headache that was coming didn’t.


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See how confusing it is?



@addstrategies  #adhd  #add  @dougmkpdp

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Amphetamines ??? — ADD Tip O the Day 659

Adderall is crystal meth!

This is not accurate, but it does make a sensational headline.  It’s from a recent post on the net. Adderall and meth are not the same, but they’re pretty similar.  And so–????

If it helps you and doesn’t harm you, that’s good.  

Please check out the links. The comments section illustrates the depth and breadth of ignorance about these things.  The level of ignorance and the level of fervor and certainty seem correlated.

Adderall is crystal meth–  the headline.

Are they the same? – well, not exactly.

Difference between?  – note some apparent contradictions.

I’ve been waiting for a good chance to use these:

medicine abuse,medication abuse,misuse,stimulant abuse,stimulant misuse,medication,medicine,stimulant,adderall,amphetamine,meth,add, adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention ,deficit,myths,ignorance,beliefs,study,college,, @addstrategies #adhd #add @dougmkpdp,

Me, after counting the millions I made prescribing stimulants.

medicine abuse,medication abuse,misuse,stimulant abuse,stimulant misuse,medication,medicine,stimulant,adderall,amphetamine,meth,add, adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention ,deficit,myths,ignorance,beliefs,study,college,, @addstrategies #adhd #add @dougmkpdp,

And did you know that no French children have ADD ADHD?







medicine abuse,medication abuse,misuse,stimulant abuse,stimulant misuse,medication,medicine,stimulant,adderall,amphetamine,meth,add, adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention ,deficit,myths,ignorance,beliefs,study,college,, @addstrategies #adhd #add @dougmkpdp,

He who knows, and knows he knows, he is wise, follow him. He who knows, and knows not he knows, he is asleep, wake him. He who knows not, and knows he knows not, he is a child, teach him. He who knows not, and knows not he knows not, he is a fool, shun him.

medicine abuse,medication abuse,misuse,stimulant abuse,stimulant misuse,medication,medicine,stimulant,adderall,amphetamine,meth,add, adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention ,deficit,myths,ignorance,beliefs,study,college,, @addstrategies #adhd #add @dougmkpdp,

No one is more certain in their views than the one who has no idea what they’re talking about.

If you’re in the Toronto area, be sure to read Shannon’s comment below.

@dougmkpdp @addstrategies @adhdstrategies #add #adhd

Posted in add, adhd, controversies, controversy, medication, medication, medicine, medicine, science, stimulants | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

The Power of One, for ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 658

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Am I procrastinating? Or just waiting til the time is right?

List of One – for ADD ADHD Overwhelmed

I was already overloaded when I got the notice that my gross receipts tax (New Mexico!) had not been paid for December, 2014. Think of the penalties! Think of all the research to do. Think of filling out the forms and writing the check and addressing the envelope. Oh my!

My short to do list was already too long and my list of five was already up to seven. I couldn’t decide where to start. I alternated between sitting, paralyzed and stagnant, or spinning around in circles.  

Then I made my list of one.  On the back of an old envelope, I wrote, “TAX.”  That was probably the most important thing on my list of eight, but it didn’t matter. I just needed to do something.

One Thing

Sometimes I think I have too many things to do.  This can cause stagnation, demoralization, procrastination.

And it’s not true.

I only have one thing to do.  In the example above, it’s the tax.

So when I’m doing something, or thinking about doing something, I’m thinking,”But, oh, I need to do this, and I need to do that, and I need to do the other, too.”

No, I only need to do one thing.  When that one is done, then I’ll need to do the next one thing, but right now, it’s just this one.

That works better.


Bonus Link:

Does ADD ADHD change with age? – from Linda Roggli


@addstrategies @dougmkpdp #add #adhd

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Life with ADD ADHD, Part Whatever — Add Tip O the 657

Here’s another life with ADD ADHD episode:

I had to do some clever detective work on the net to find the phone number I needed.  Was real proud of myself.  Wrote it down.  Closed the website.  Picked up the phone.

You following this so far?

Started dialing on my cell phone.  Got to the last two numbers. 


But it didn’t matter much.  I was dialing on my calculator.

Oh, well.

Found the number again on the net.  Wrote it down, legibly.

Dialed it carefully.  It had been disconnected.

You still with me?

Rechecked the website.  I had transposed two numbers.

Redialed.  Got the right answering machine.  Left a message. 

Hope I left my phone number correctly.  Pretty sure I spelled my name right.

Anybody understand what I’m talking about here?

The strategy:

Whenever I write down numbers, stop at once and check that I can read them.  I know this.  I just didn’t do it.  

A strategy for the rest of it?  No strategies, that’s just life with ADD ADHD.


Bonus Link :

Planning Systems from Homey

add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,stategies,add problems,adhd problems,living with add,living with adhd

                                Life can be just a little harder with ADD ADHD.

@dougmkp @adultstrategies @adultaddstrategies    #ADDers #add #adhd #adultadd  #adultADHD  #ADHDsure

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Living with ADD ADHD, Homey’s Version — ADD Tip o the Day 657

I’ve been gone and am a little behind (what else is new). So was delighted when Homey came up with this great post, comparing living with ADD ADHD to living without it, like her husband does.  Of course, he’s obviously a little exceptional, but he still helps make the point.  Homey is exceptional, too.  I continue to be amazed at all she accomplishes, ADD ADHD or not.  She’s the planner maven, so she thinks her post is about planners, but I think it’s about living and coping.

So I’m coasting today.  Enjoy:


My husband, David, and I are very different in the way we go about our day-to-day activities.  He’s a remodeling contractor.  He has a planner I set up for him and he sort of uses it.  He mainly uses the blank paper to write notes or to-do lists.  He frequently writes lists on random scraps of paper and throws them away when they’re done.  He doesn’t write his daily plans on paper.  He doesn’t have printed routines or schedules or to-do lists.  When he’s working on the house, he just does the next thing and he intuitively knows what that is.  He cleans as he goes, picks up after himself and doesn’t forget (usually) important tasks.  Did I mention that he’s a born organized?  He just knows what to do and he does it.

I’m a full-time homemaker.  I blog, spent lots of time with my grandkids and take care of the house.  I cook, clean, pay bills, grocery shop, etc.  And I can’t live without a planner.  I write anything and everything down.  I am NOT a born organized and I don’t intuitively know what needs done next.  I have ADHD and it’s a real pain in the butt when it comes to managing my home and my time.

However, I can accomplish almost as much as David does but I need a little help doing it.  My brain doesn’t work as efficiently as his does so I have to compensate a little – okay, maybe a lot.  The compensation comes in the form of my planner.

  • He has a lot going on his brain but somehow he’s able to process it and put it in its rightful place inside his brain.  I have a lot going on, too, but I can’t process it.  It overwhelms me.  I have to get it out of my brain and on paper.  Then and only then can I put it in its rightful place.
  • He makes a list, does it and then throws it away (he doesn’t always make a written list – often he keeps it in his head). My response is much more complicated.  I make a list.  Then I rebel against the list.  Then I decide maybe I’ll do a few things on the list or maybe something else.  Eventually I get some of the stuff done on the list. But I never throw it away because there are unfinished things on the list and I need a record in case I have to look back to see if I did something and when.  But I still do better than if I didn’t have a list.
  • He intuitively knows what to do next.  I don’t have a clue.  Because of my ADHD, everything seems equally important.  And there’s so much I think I need to do that I don’t know what to do next.  Since I don’t have that intuition that he has, I have to make a list – actually, a daily plan.  A list doesn’t always cut it for me.  I need to plan out the day and figure out what I need to do and when I might be able to do it.  If I simply wing it, I won’t get anything done or I’ll get the wrong things done.  And getting the wrong things done is almost as bad as doing nothing at all.  So he can plan his day in his head but I have to do it on paper.
  • He has a routine and follows it.  I have to thoughtfully create a routine, write it down and then remind myself to follow it. I have a page in my planner that includes my routines.  It may seem silly, but it’s the only way I will consistently do them.  I know that sort of contradicts the idea of a routine (something you do automatically) but trust me, I have to do it this way.
  • He’s motivated.  He knows what needs done and he does it.  Period.  That’s it.  I, on the other hand, lack motivation and have to find ways to create it.  I use games, strategies, rewards, stickers – whatever it takes.  Sometimes it’s as simple as writing things down and marking them off.  He doesn’t need the satisfaction of marking something off.  I do.
  • He cleans as he goes.  He sees something that needs done and he does it.  I see something that needs done and I add it to my list.  I’ve gotten better at cleaning as I go – by following his example – but I’m still not great at it.  But I have learned that when I see something that needs done, to write it on my list.  We both get it done – it just takes me longer.

ADD/ADHD makes time management much harder, but having the right tool, in my case a planner, can make the difference between success and failure.  Without my planner, I flounder.  With my planner, I can defeat (or at least cripple) my ADHD and accomplish great things.  David might be superman all on his own, but with the help of my planner, I can be super, too.

Thank you, Homey


Quote o the Day:  The two secrets of life are showing up and hanging in there.

.         E J Khantzian, MD

ADD,ADHD,planner,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,homemaking,planner,homemaker,strategies,notebook,#add,#adhd,@dougmkpd,@addstrategies

Homey, the ADD ADHD Planner Maven

Homey’s Website







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Structure and Routine And Strategies for ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 656

Structure and Strategies

Structure is essential.  I don’t consider it a strategy though.  Not quite sure why. Probably because it is so basic.

Basics include sleep, structure, exercise, and maybe getting outside, mediation or yoga or something like that.  Basics also include to-do lists and appointment books and calendars.

Structure pretty much means routine.  Get up and go to bed at about the same time usually, same for breakfast, lunch and dinner, and tooth brushing.  Church on Sunday. Don’t have to think about those things, don’t have to make decisions.

A strategy is a way of dealing with a very specific problem. 

I keep losing my keys, I’m often late picking up the kids from school, I’ve driven off with the gas hose in my tank three times, I’m paying late charges because I don’t get around to paying the bills, etc.  Those are specific problems.

To qualify as A Problem it has to be frequent enough or serious enough or inconvenient enough to make it worth the effort to work on it.  Or put another way, fixing it is going to make my life better.

Then the principle kicks in: identify the problem, make a strategy, make a rule (and keep on it even when I slip up), make it a habit.  Then I don’t have to remember it or think about it. Life will get better.

Note: Some people don’t like structure.  But then, some people like drama.

Second Note: I think this post came off a comment from Ram.  Hope all of you are reading the comments.  They’re great!


add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,strategies,schedule,structure,strategy,disorganization

A weekly schedule. More structure for my ADD ADHD.


Bonus Link:  Very interesting ADD ADHD information from Dr. Amen. I fear it may be a little too advanced for me.




#add #adhd #addproblems #adhdproblems   @dougmkp @addstrategies @insightADHD #adhdsure

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ADD ADHD and My Addictions. What Are Your Addictions? — ADD Tip O the Day 655

Many things can be addicting for us.  I’ve been  addicted to computer war games and to caffeine, but not anymore.  My only current addiction is food.

Hall marks of addiction are craving, time and energy and money spent on thinking about it, on seeking it, and on doing it, and loss of control. Boy, I have sure had those.

I loved my computer games but they were eating up my life.  I came up with a good strategy to deal with that.  It didn’t work, so I figured out another good strategy.  It didn’t work either.  After three or more strategies, I erased all the games off my computer and threw away all the discs.  It was very painful.  I loved those games.

I still have free cell on my wife’s computer (she never plays it) and chess and poker on my cell phone, but so far I can control the free cell, am not playing it at all lately, and only play the phone games when I’m stuck waiting or on a trip.  So these haven’t been a problem.  Yet.  And maybe they won’t be – I enjoy them but don’t love them.

What are your addictions and what do you do about them?


Niall on ADD ADHD and various addictions

ADD,ADHD,addiction,adult ADD,adult ADHD,ADD brain,ADHD brain,attention deficit

One of my old dear addictions.


Bonus Link: Not about ADD ADHD but you owe it to yourself to watch this

– the brpppp act if you haven’t seen it yet..

Bonus Bonus Link:   The Terror of the ADD ADHD Diagnosis

Quote O the Day:

If playing computer games was an occupation, ADD ADHD would not be a disorder.


@dougmkpdp  @addstrategies  #add #adhd #adult add #adult adhd #adhdandaddiction

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Living with ADD ADHD, another chapter – – – ADD Tip O the Day 654

Oh, my!

These kinds of things happen to almost everybody sometimes. They just happen to me a lot of the time. A lot of the time.

  1. A friend graciously agreed to read an early draft of the next book.  Early drafts are ugly.

So I emailed it to her.  But I spelled her name wrong in the address.  “Nacny”.  This could happen to anyone, right?

So I corrected it, and sent it again.  “”

Do you see where I’m going with this?

2. I rushed to the County Court House to vote absentee because I can’t make it Nov.3.  But the election clerk’s office was locked and no one answered my knock.  I found someone in a nearby office and they phoned and a nice lady came and led me to the correct office. Could happen to anybody, right?

The nice lady told me the election is not until June.  Could happen to – – –?

I filled out the form requesting the absentee ballot anyway.  Who knows where I might be June?

When I got home, I realized I had put down the wrong zip code. Could happen – – –?

I realized that my little voice had told me that I wasn’t sure about my zip code and I could check it on my driver’s license, but I was in a hurry and I was holding up the nice lady and I ignored it. It wasn’t very loud. Could – – –?

3.  Getting ready for cold weather.  Found 4 pair of long underwear bottoms.  No tops.

4.  I had a great link to post but then I couldn’t find it so I wrote a long thing about that but then I found it. But I’d already written the long thing.

Anyway, here it is –  you really need to watch this.  Give Yourself a Treat Even If It’s Not About ADD ADHD.


1. Double check everything.  This takes a little more time, but not nearly as much as if I don’t.

2. Listen to the little voice.  I just wish it was a little louder and that I didn’t have to keep learning this same lesson over and over.

3. Get my wife to find the long underwear tops.

Note: You can’t make this stuff up!

add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,to do,to-do,strategy, strategies,wisdom,tips,living with ADD,living with ADHD,coping with ADD,coping with ADHD,list,to do list,to-do list,time,schedule

Plan ahead. Give God a good laugh.


Bonus Link:

Homey hits another homer – don’t we always plan for more than we can possibly do?



Posted in add | 12 Comments

Diet and ADD ADHD, New Findings — ADD Tip O the Day 653

Much has been written about diet and ADD ADHD. The research shows that special diets can have some benefit for some people, but  sound like a headache to manage and often for small benefit. I have been dubious.  Now more general research  (by Felice Jacka PhD) is showing an effect of diet on the brain. This could have implications for ADD ADHD.

In summary, the Western junk food diet causes a shrinkage of the left hippocampus. A more rational, balanced diet can cause growth of the left hippocampus. The left hippocampus is associated with memory and learning.

From the article:

Many animal studies show that saturated fats and refined sugars have a negative effect on the brain proteins that protect brain cells from oxidative stress and that promote growth of new brain cells.

Further, antioxidants, or protective lipids, like omega-3 fatty acid (fish oil), increase these protective proteins.

So I try to keep an open mind, even with my shrunken hippocampus.  These findings don’t suggest that bad diet causes ADD ADHD, but since we presumably have no hippocampus to spare, bad diet could make us worse.

I’m working on  a big post on recent science about ADD ADHD, but it’s complicated.  Be patient.


Link to the full article

Fun quick pretty complete presentation on ADD ADHD

Another Freebie – James Clear on Habits

Another Link: Not about ADD ADHD, but you really need to see this.  Well, actually, maybe it could be related to ADD ADHD.  OK, so I lost the link. But let me assure you, it was great.  Still looking.

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,adult ADD,adult ADHD, ADD,ADHD,adult ADD,adult ADHD,diet,food,omega,fish,science,controversy,hippocampus, western diet,memory,learning

With ADD ADHD, it can be hard to remember to get everything you need.


Posted in add, controversies, controversy, educate yourself, educate yourself, science, studying and learning | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

The Answers to All Your Questions — ADD Tip O the Day 652

Is Life Complicated?

Clearly it’s more complicated if we have ADD ADHD.  But wait!

Life is not as complicated as people think.  In fact, you can understand any situation, answer any question, by simply using one of four keys:

  1. It’s about the money.
  2. It’s hormonal.
  3. It’s more complicated than that.
  4. It will take longer than that.

Can you think of any question that can’t be answered by one of these?


Legitimate question: What does this have to do with ADD ADHD?

Answer: Beats me.  I just thought it was valuable enough to share with you.

Note:  My wife thinks some of these posts are too long.  Like the last one.

Bonus Bonus Bonus:  Jerry Bair’s new book on the to- do list is just out and for the moment it’s free.  It’s very good.  I suggest you grab it.   clik

Bonus Link: I read that everyone with Tourette’s Syndrome also has ADHD.  You really need to watch this.

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,explanations, understanding,questions,answers,life,answers to life

With ADD ADHD we’re not too good with time.


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Rules Can Help You With ADD ADHD: a follow up – – – ADD Tip O the Day 651

My wife is back!

  Thank God!

But I didn’t unravel.  I give the credit to the rules, although having the structure of writing on the next book was also helpful.

Report on the rules:

  1. No alcohol.  – I scored 100% on this one. It wasn’t very hard. However, I’m ready to resume the cocktail hour with my wife and the Friday night frozen margarita with Mexican food.  We’ll have to watch the effect on my weight.                                                       
  2. Only one free cell game per day. – I managed to stick to this. It was very tempting to do more. My other little voice- “Come on, just one more won’t hurt.” Does that sound like an alcoholic? Free cell is addictive, at least for me.

                    I plan to lay off of free cell again. There’s nothing wrong with playing free cell    cell except it’s addictive. I can spend the same time practicing the guitar or the harmonica.  That’s relaxing too. I remind myself, if I only play one game a day and it only takes five minutes (fat chance), that’s over a half hour a week and over 30 hours a year.  I think even I could improve my guitar playing with 30 hours more of practice.

3. No TV. – I never turned on the TV. Our neighbors had me over for coffee and they were watching football. I  enjoyed watching the last minutes of U Texas getting beat. High point of my day. Surely this doesn’t count against me.  I was tempted to watch the Raven’s game, but that would’ve taken up a lot of time and wouldn’t have  been as much fun  by myself.  So I passed.  I didn’t miss it.

Report On Goals:

I can get a lot of work done.  – I did. Finished the first draft of my next book and started on the second. Yea!

Maybe lose weight.  –  Lost 4 pounds. Very difficult. Lots of salad, small portions of other food, only one dessert the whole time – couldn’t very well pass up the lemon meringue pie. I must confess I ate the fantastic banana nut bread my wife had baked for me.

Do more guitar practice.  –  I did! Caught up on some old pieces  I had lost and learned some new fretboard and techniques. I owe thanks to my nephew Ron and the videos he made for me.  He’s an excellent teacher.


I used the “locked in” strategy. By posting to you what I was doing and knowing that I would report the result, I was locked in. That improved my chances.


Rules can be helpful.

Doug                        add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,disorder,dysfunction,disfunction,games,free cell,free-cell,alcohol,rules,habits, strategy, strategies,tips,living with ADD,living with ADHD,coping with ADD,coping with ADHD, @addstrategies #adhd #add @dougmkpdp
Some days with ADD ADHD just surviving is a great triumph..

Bonus Link:  Dr. Brown on myths about ADD ADHD

@addstrategies  #adhd  #add  @dougmkpdp

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Living with ADD ADHD: Another Typical ADD ADHD Experience — ADD Tip O the Day 650

We Procrastinate

I’ve been needing to get my fingerprints done (don’t ask). At the Department of Public Safety, waaaay across town. I finally got all the paper work done and then  carefully put it all in a manila folder. I labeled  the folder so it wouldn’t get lost.  I even double checked  to see that it was all correct (Yea me!).

I made a commitment to get the prints done today. I did piddle around a while and time was slipping away, but I picked up the folder and set out. I drove waaaay across town and didn’t even get lost once.

We Screw Up

When I got to the Department of Public Safety, I picked up the manila folder and started to get out of the car. That’s when I noticed that it was the wrong manila folder.

I drove back home without incident.  Maybe I should wait until tomorrow to go back and not do all that driving back to back? But that sounds suspiciously like procrastinating. And I’d rather get it done.

Sometimes We Do Good

So I drove back.  Did I mention that it’s  waaaay across town? Everything went smoothly. It was a good feeling to cross this off my to do list. It had been on there for a while.

Not Everything Is Our Fault

On the way back, along the same route, I got stuck in the wrong lane.  I had to make a slight detour. No big deal. Then a guy in a big black SUV decided to cross in front of me.  I stayed calm, did not curse,  and made no hand gestures. I just slowed to let him cross.  Instead,  he decided to stop in the middle of the road. I slammed on the brakes.  Another car was coming toward him from the other side. It could have been very interesting. But we stopped and he went on. Okay, I did make a hand gesture then but not the one you’re thinking of.

We Can Try To Keep A Positive Attitude

When I got home, I said to myself, “I deserve a drink.” But this is the week my wife is gone and I’m not drinking (See  post 649).  Then I said to myself, “Well, at least I can get a post out of it.”


Optomistic Thought O the Day:                                                  

add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,to do,to-do,strategy, strategies,living with ADD,living with ADHD,coping with ADD,coping with ADHD,list,to do list,to-do list,blunders,episodes

ADD ADHD has just been practice?

Something good comes out of everything.

Bonus Link O the Day:

Natural selection at work – so why are there so many of us still around?

(This is similar to the link that I lost. Still can’t find that one. )

A Heads Up:

The next post is a report on how I did while my wife was gone.  Just in case you’ve been wondering.

@addstrategies  #adhd  #add  @dougmkpdp

Posted in add | 10 Comments

Rules Can Make Your Life Better with ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 649

Using Rules:

A major principle for coping with ADD ADHD is:  identify a problem, design a strategy, make it a rule, make it a habit.  But with ADD ADHD there are other uses for rules .

Some of us do better with people around us. Some don’t. Some study better with music. Some find it a distraction. Some study better with someone else in the room. Some don’t. I do better with someone around and with music.

When my wife is gone, I do great. For three days. Then everything starts to unravel. I do better with her around.  And without her, a lot of my structure is gone.  I stop functioning.

But this time, I’m trying new strategies, based on rules.

  1. No alcohol.
  2. Only one free cell game a day.
  3. No TV.

Goals: I can get a lot of work done. Maybe lose weight. Do more guitar practice.

I know that if I break a rule once, the dam is likely to break and I can just forget it.

We’ll see.


add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,disorder,dysfunction,disfunction,games,free cell,free-cell,alcohol,rules,habits, strategy, strategies, tips,living with ADD,living with ADHD,coping with ADD,coping with ADHD

When I’m unraveled with ADD ADHD

Bonus Links:

15 good habits to make to make your life better


Follow Up On Call to Verizon:  In case you’re wondering, I did call Verizon.  Wasn’t on hold too long.  The lady was nice. She took a long time researching options. While I waited. Turns out that once our contracts are up, we could save a few bucks by reducing the minutes available to us. Don’t want to do that.  But I did make the call.  Can cross that off.

@addstrategies  #adhd  #add  @dougmkpdp

you can check the good comments by clicking comments in the long list at the bottom of the post

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, relationships, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

ADD ADHD Talking To Myself — ADD Tip O the Day 648

Sometimes I talk to myself out loud, sometimes just inside my head.

“You need to call Verizon.”

I don’t want to call Verizon.

“You need to call Verizon anyway.”

It probably won’t do any good.

“You need to try.”

OK. Let me do one game of free cell first.

“You’ll have plenty of time to play free cell while you’re on hold.  Aren’t you always bragging about multitasking?”

No.  Anyway, this conversation would make a good blog post.  Let me get it down before I forget it.


—- to be continued.  How will it turn out?

Does this sound familiar to anyone?

doug and “doug”      

#add #adhd @addadultstrategies @addstrategies @dougmkpdp

add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,disorder,dysfunction,disfunction,procrastination,put it off,avoid,games,free cell,free-cell

With ADD ADHD, we need all the help we can get.




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Is ADHD A Disorder? — ADD Tip O the Day 647

I found this on the net.  The link is below if you want to watch it.  I didn’t.

“ADHD As A Difference In Cognition, Not A Disorder: Stephen Tonti at TEDxCMU”

Well, it is a difference.  It’s a difference that is not “normal” – ie it’s not very common – and it causes a lot of dysfunction – that’s in the definition of ADD ADHD. Isn’t normal and causes dysfunction.  How is that different from a disorder?

Does this kind of misinformation cause harm or does it not matter?

Could it-

  • cause people to not get help?
  • cause insurance companies to not cover treatment?
  • cause more stigma?
  • cause less stigma?
  • have any other effects?

Disorder, Disease, Normal

I was surprised to find that these terms have no commonly accepted medical definitions.

Or can someone correct me on this?

clik for the you tube talk – if you do watch it please comment.

Important note:

Ram watched it.  Be sure to read Ram’s comment below.  Thank you Ram.


add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,disorder,dysfunction,disfunction,brain,imaging,normal,abnormal,cognition,different,difference

Is ADD ADHD a disorder?

Bonus Links:

from Melissa Orlov on marriage, but applies to more

Terms and Definitions Related to ADD ADHD

Note O the Day:

The Santa Fe New Mexican published an edited version of my letter about the Rosemond piece on diet.  They cut out that he is not a psychologist and that he has been in trouble for misrepresenting his credentials.  They publish his column.

Also one of the two pediatricians he misquotes is not a pediatrician but a nurse practicioner.

@addstrategies @dougmkpdp #add #adhd

Posted in add, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD strategies, controversies, controversy, diagnosis, educate yourself, medication, medicine, science | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

ADHD Medications: Side effects, Dangers, and other Boogey Men — ADD Tip O the Day 646


Why we don’t take the medicine:

Some people just don’t like to take medicines.  It’s just a thing.  OK.

Some people think all medicines are harmful.  Well, that’s OK, too, I guess.

Some people are uninformed or misinformed.  Well, there’s a possibility of help for that.

I prefer natural substances.  Are  you aware that if natural substances work, they generally do the same thing in your body that the medications do?  That they are produced without regulatory control? That most of what you buy does not contain what it says it does and some of it contain things that are harmful?

I don’t want the side effects.   The side effects listed for the medicines are possible side effects.   That does not mean you will get them.  The percentages are available for each medicine – maybe 40% of the people taking this medicine get this side effect, or maybe only 1 in 100,000.  It will still be listed as a side effect.  If you do get a side effect, most of them will go away in a few days if you stay on the medicine.  Or you can reduce the dose, change the timing, or switch to a different medicine.   Almost all side effects will go away if you stop taking the medicine. You don’t have to stay on it and suffer.

It’s too expensive.   Very good point!  But see about the generic, shop different pharmacies, see if your doctor can help you with this.  There may be another less expensive form.

I want to beat this myself, without a crutch.  Good luck with that!  If you try a while and it’s not working, then maybe you’ll try the medicines.

Those medicines are addictive.  The research shows that there is a very low rate of abuse and an extremely low rate of addiction from these medicines in people who actually have ADD ADHD.

The medicines are dangerous.  If you are in generally good health, don’t have high blood pressure, haven’t had heart problems and don’t have a family history of certain heart problems, the medicines are safe.  Even if you have risk factors, usually you can use one of the medicines with some precautions.

My cousin’s neighbor said that her friend’s hairdresser told her that that medicine made his brother-in -law’s hair turn green and his ears fall off.          What can I say?

Try It:

I believe that everyone with ADD ADHD, adult or child, deserves a trial of medication.  It may not help, it will help many, for some it’s  a miracle.  You won’t know without trying it.


Definition O the Day: 

Confirmation bias is the tendency to search for, interpret, favor, and recall information in a way that confirms one’s beliefs or hypotheses while giving disproportionately less attention to information that contradicts it.

or put another way:

The Misconception: Your opinions are the result of years of rational, objective analysis.

The Truth: Your opinions are the result of years of paying attention to information which confirmed what you believed while ignoring information which challenged your preconceived notions.

Bonus Link:

Long well-informed well-reasoned excellent discussion by K. Kalikow MD about using medication.

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,disorder,medicine,medication,drugs,

ADD ADHD, the gift that keeps on giving.

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADHD problems, attitudes, controversies, medication, medication, medicine, medicine, stimulants | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

ADD ADHD and Wisdom? A Dozen Top Tips — ADD Tip O the Day 645

We ADDer’s are not renowned for our wisdom. Even so, you would think that by this advanced age I would have learned some things that could be of value to others.

So here is my advice, for what it’s worth. Some of it is specific to ADD ADHD.

  1. Trust in God. This is very hard to do.
  2. Do what is right. Be prepared to pay the consequences.
  3. When you are absolutely sure you are right, consider the possibility that you’re wrong.
  4. Look for opportunities to help others but take care of yourself and don’t be a patsy.
  5. Practice saying “No.”
  6. Meditate. Exercise. Take omega three fatty acids and a multi-vitamin. Do not smoke. Try to keep your weight down – this is very hard.
  7. Do it now, do it right and do the hard part first.
  8. Break everything into small steps and focus on one thing at a time.
  9. Make a long to do list but work off of a short one.  Realize that you will never catch up.
  10. Recognize that the most important things are your relationships, your health and your time.  Really!
  11.  Don’t ignore the negative but focus on the positive. Appreciate the beauty that you are surrounded with.
  12. Remember that we are all more alike than different, yet everyone is unique. And everyone is carrying a wound or a burden that you are not aware of.

Extra Note: There is so much more than we can ever imagine and so much that we cannot ever understand.

Invitation: Will you share your own hard earned wisdom with us here?


I finally found the lost link!

Just about everything about coping with ADD ADHD from Segal and Smith


add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,to do,to-do,strategy, strategies,wisdom,tips,living with ADD,living with ADHD,coping with ADD,coping with ADHD

With ADD ADHD I get to keep learning the same things over and over.


@addstrategies  #adhd  #add  @dougmkpdp

Posted in add, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD strategies, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

Lies, Distortions and Half-truths About ADD ADHD – Is This Harmful? — ADD Tip O the Day 644

“Best treatment for ADHD: Healthy diet”

This is the headline from John Rosemond’s syndicated column in the Santa Fe New Mexican, 9/13/2015.

He states that he and Dr. Ravenel  found that there is no good evidence that ADHD is a disease, probably inherited, that affects brain chemistry and function.

He states that “on numerous occasions” they have seen ADHD symptoms disappear completely without medication.  As opposed to the headline, they attribute these results to “a combination of strategic discipline, restricting electronic media and diet.” This is called anecdotal evidence, as opposed to scientific research. At first, I assumed that Mr. Rosemond would not lie about this and I wondered if those patients had been incorrectly diagnosed. Now, I question my assumption. Also, Mr. Rosemond didn’t mention that they do not believe that ADHD exists.

Mr. Rosemund states that two pediatricians, Millichap and Yee, “emphasize adding Omega-3 fatty acids and decreasing or completely eliminating processed foods, artificial colorings, and preservatives.”  He quotes them, “Supplemental diet therapy is simple, relatively inexpensive and is more acceptable to patient and parent.”

The abstract of the Millichap Yee paper actually states “In practice, additive-free and oligoantigenic/elimination diets are time-consuming and disruptive to the household; they are indicated only in selected patients. Iron and zinc are supplemented in patients with known deficiencies; they may also enhance the effectiveness of stimulant therapy. In patients failing to respond or with parents opposed to medication, omega-3 supplements may warrant a trial.”

Yee, by the way, is not a pediatrician, but a nurse practitioner.

The scientific research shows that some children benefit somewhat from diet modification and many benefit a little from omega – 3 supplements.  Also that the medications, which Rosemond and Ravenel oppose, are not helpful to some, are significantly helpful to many, and are a miracle for some.  This fits with my  experience (anecdotal).

The scientific evidence is quite strong for the existence of ADHD, its partially genetic basis and the demonstrable abnormalities in brain structure, chemistry and function.

from Wikipedia:

Rosemond is known for his old-fashioned parenting philosophy and approach. That, in combination with his outspoken political conservatism, has earned him a number of critics, especially within the mental health professions. Rosemond, a psychologist, generally begins his presentations by telling his audiences that “psychology is a secular religion that one believes in by faith” and that psychology has done more harm than good to the American family.

Rosemond advocates what he calls a traditional disciplinary approach to parenting, a view that makes him controversial. Some don’t like his views on toilet training[3] and spanking [4] as they run counter to other parenting experts’ recommendations.

John Rosemond has a master’s degree (MS), and is licensed as a “psychological associate” in the State of North Carolina. Over the years, Rosemond has received disciplinary sanctions from the North Carolina Licensing Board for misrepresenting his professional credentials and assuming provider-client relationship in inappropriate circumstances.

There is nothing wrong with trying diet modification, electronic media restriction and appropriate discipline. Unfortunately, discipline is not very effective with ADHD children. The damage would come from waiting too long if this is not working. I believe that everyone with ADHD deserves a trial of medication.

PS I am adding the excellent point from Mindbody (see comments) that even if there is some improvement from these approaches and without medication, it is unlikely to be sustained when the situation changes – the parents get tired of maintaining such discipline or the kid goes to college and loses his important structure, for examples.


ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, adult ADD,adult ADHD,relationships,understanding,What ADD is like,what ADHD is like,living with ADD,living with ADHD,#ADD,#adhd,#@addstrategies

Distortions, half truths, and lies about ADD ADHD.

John Rosemond’s column

Paper from Millichap MD and Yee CNP

ADHD does not exist -Ravenel and Rosemund


Posted in add | 8 Comments

ADD ADHD Rocks! Or Does It Suck? — ADD Tip O the Day 643

Does ADD ADHD rock or does it suck?  A controversy!

This is from my gifted buddy Ken (edited).  My comments are in italics.

Why ADHD rocks – surprising view of a freelancing expat
Date: September 2, 2015

By Ken Powell –
“…  If you could give me a pill to take it away – I wouldn’t touch it! I love my ADHD and wouldn’t be without it.
I’m blessed that my particular form of ADHD didn’t need medication and is something known as ‘twice exceptional’ – in other words I’ve never struggled with behaviour or concentration or any of the other negative things we often associate with it.        WOW!!
My ADHD has enabled me to do MORE, learn more, love more and help more.
In fact, there’s good reason to suggest that ADHD has never been the problem at all – it’s society that has the issue.”

Ken goes on to suggest that society is the cause of ADD ADHD.  He argues that if hyperactivity and hyperfocus gave our early ancestors an evolutionary advantage then the problem is that we are now expected to go to school.  But wouldn’t that mean that our ancestors had ADD ADHD but it wasn’t a problem until school?  So it wouldn’t be society that caused ADD ADHD, society just caused it to be a problem instead of the advantage it previously was.

…So really this condition was made by society changing. Girls can have ADHD too …but history seems to have made it so that most kids with ADHD are male. This is correct for ADHD but seems to minimize the problems that ADD inattentive type causes for girls.

There’s hundreds of attributes known to be typical of ADHD but no one has them all. To be diagnosed with ADHD you usually have to exhibit a significant number of these traits but not every one. Yes, except I would quibble about “usually”.

Here I want to share just a few reasons why ADHD, when harnessed well, is brilliant and not debilitating.   When harnessed well!!!!

My Top 9 Positive Points for ADHD

1. We have tons of energy – the trick is harnessing it!  Exactly!

2. We’re enthusiastic – we’re free thinkers and our enthusiasm is infectious. Can be, but a lot of times we just piss other people off.

3. We’re generally pretty nice people
We’re warm, loving, kind and have a great love of humor. We’re sensitive and compassionate. And we’re great with kids! In fact we’re very family-minded, love to volunteer to help others and love making new friends. I believe that Ken is a nice person and has these traits.  Sometimes I have some of them myself.  Sometimes. Much less so when I’m stressed by the problems my ADD ADHD causes or when I’m hyperfocused.

I don’t have any data about us being nice in general.

… they make great babysitters.  If we don’t drive off with the baby on top of the car or set the house afire or forget that we’re baby sitting or —.

4. We’re big-picture people.
We can see patterns in chaos, notice things more broadly and make connections easily. That does mean sometimes we see things differently, so differently you might wonder what planet we’re on, but on the whole we can give a fresh perspective on things.  I agree we have that tendency.

5. We hyper-focus on the stuff we find interesting. Yes, and we can be very productive. But I don’t have much control over when or what I hyperfocus on or when I unhyperfocus, so it can be a problem.

6. We live in the ‘now’.
We’re impulsive and don’t live too much for the future. Well, I have a lot of concern about the future and try to plan ahead but I have a hard time telling when the future is. Something I need to prepare for that’s next month seems like eons away.  It will sneak up on me.  That’s a problem.  

…that makes us good company.  Unless we’re being inappropriate and annoying and not doing what we’d said we’d do.

7. We need less sleep.  I can get by on less sleep sometimes because I have insomnia but I don’t  function as well.  I have no data that we need less sleep, just that we get less sleep.

8. We’re speedy thinkers
We’ve learned to think on our feet and adapt well to change. … That makes us good to have around in a crisis or when a quick decision needs making.  Sometimes a crisis triggers our hyperfocus and we do extremely well.  Sometimes.  I’m not sure it’s consistent.

9. We’re creative.

Brainstorming, thinking outside the box, creative solutions: That’s us!   We do seem to do this.  Yea, us!

This comment already from anon – so good I’m adding it here:

” I’m happy for those who don’t feel their ADHD is a problem, as long as they acknowledge that most of us actually suffer a great deal, and respect that. Though part of me wonders if anyone can be diagnosed with ADHD if they’re NOT suffering as a consequence of having it. And more than just with school. Isn’t that part of the DSM criteria? Significant impairment in multiple areas of life? I do enjoy my creativity (sometimes, when I can channel it – being creative without being able to accomplish anything meaningful for long periods of time is intensely depressing.)”


More Later.                                                            

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One of my ADD ADHD problems.

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My ADD ADHD brain works. Sometimes.  Someways. Where was I going with this?


ADD ADHD,add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,medicine,medication,medications,drugs, alternatives,natural,herbs, vitamins,supplements,biofeedback, feedback,neurofeedback,natural,food coloring,food additives,diet,evaluation,diagnosis,treatment,therapy,counseling

If this isn’t my ADD ADHD, what is it?


Ken on ADHD Rocks!

Ken’s website on writing

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Your Brain and Your ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 642

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, strategy,strategies,symptoms,problems,brain,genes,genetics,frontal,frontal lobe,amygdale,subcortical,science,research,mind

The ADD ADHD mind.

Your Genes

We each have two copies of the serotonin transport gene, SERT, one from each parent.  This gene regulates uptake of serotonin back into the cell.

The gene comes in two flavors, long (L) and short (S). If you’re lucky, you got LL. You are not very sensitive to stress and you’re unlikely to become depressed no matter what happens.  You also have less anxiety.

With SS, you are very likely to become depressed in response to stress.   With LS, you’re in between.

With early childhood stress, the frontal area of the brain does not develop as well.  There is a lack of volume in the areas responsible for controlling response to stress and to unpleasant feelings and for controlling impulses.

If you have SS, you’re more sensitive to stress and this effect on your brain is more profound.

With SS things that are stressful to you will cause a bigger reaction than for your buddy with LL. He might not even find them stressful it all.  On the other hand, if you have ADD ADHD you might be creating more stress in your life.

Your Brain

Recent research shows that those of us with the combination of SS and more stress have less frontal brain volume and more severe ADD ADHD symptoms.  Those with LL have more normal frontal brain volumes and less severe ADHD symptoms, regardless of  stressful life experiences.

With ADD ADHD  there is also less good connection between the regulating frontal areas and the stress responding lower areas (subcortical structures).

For most ADD ADHD children the brain gets more normal with aging.  Stimulants (ritalin, adderall, vyvanse, daytrana, etc.) also change brain structures toward normal in children and in adults.

We have to be careful about confusing cause and effect and remember that  correlation does not prove causation.  But these findings are very suggestive.

Your Input – a request

I welcome comments from everyone but especially invite our scientists to correct any misinformation here.  I don’t claim to really understand this stuff.



ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, strategy,strategies,symptoms,problems,brain,genes,genetics,frontal,frontal lobe,amygdale,subcortical,science,research

Is this what made you?

“Brain Correlates of the Interaction Between 5-HTTLPR and Psychosocial Stress Mediating Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Severity”,van der Meer et al,Am J Pychiatry, August 2015

ADD ADHD brains function differently

Stimulants improve brain structure in case the link doesn’t work)

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, strategy,strategies,symptoms,problems,brain,genes,genetics,frontal,frontal lobe,amygdale,subcortical,science,research,mind,imaging

The ADD ADHD brain is different.

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, dysfunctions, medication, medication, medicine, medicine, science, stimulants | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

ADD ADHD Lies We Tell Ourselves — ADD Tip O the Day 641

I’m busy.  —  No, you only have one thing to do.

I don’t need to write it down. — Oh, really?

It’ll be OK. — No, it won’t.

I have plenty of time. — Yeah, right! How many ways can you find to screw around so that you’ll wind up late?

I have to —.   No, you don’t have to do anything (except die maybe).  You choose which consequences you choose to have.


Bonus point:

Here is a great comment I got on the first edition of this post, from Jeff:

Also, you forgot one of the lies I often tell myself: “I’ll have more time to work on this later.” – No I won’t. I have to realize this lie isn’t true, and keep that in mind upon deciding when and if to work on the task at hand. Jeff

Orlov on “have to”  and on nagging

@addstrategies @dougmkpdp #add #adhd

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,,strategies,busy,time,late,forget,remember,memory,lies,delusions

Time is a booger.

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, attitudes, dysfunctions, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Diagnosis and Therapy for ADD ADHD? — ADD Tip O the Day 640

A Response To Some Questions

Everyone needs a careful thorough evaluation by a competent knowledgeable professional (good luck there) before being diagnosed with ADD ADHD.  (There are other things that can look like ADD ADHD and there are other conditions that often accompany it.)

Managing ADD ADHD
Once diagnosed, you need:
1. Education about ADD ADHD.
2. Strategies to cope with specific problems. Plus, basic overall approaches (sleep, structure, exercise, meditation, outdoors).  A coach would be good.
3. Discussion of  options about medications. Most people would be best served by trying them. (Sometimes they are wonderfully helpful, sometimes not.)
4, Therapy/counseling ( This might start a little later; this diagnosis and program is a big pill to swallow all at once).

Why Therapy?

ADD ADHD generates shame, demoralization, feelings of futility and helplessness, low self-esteem, etc. etc. etc., and often depression. These need to be addressed. That will help you do better with strategies and the strategies will help you do better with these problems. The medications will help you focus enough to use the strategies.

While simply addressing the psychological emotional issues can be a significant help, it won’t be enough by itself  to address the ADD ADHD.

Other Approaches

I think this is the best approach. I’m not really familiar with  other approaches. At some point, it could be useful to discuss other options, such as neuro feedback, diet alterations, or other alternatives, but I don’t have much knowledge about them or strong data supporting their use.
These are my opinions, based on my own experiences and the amount of studying and research I’ve been able to do.



@dougmkpdp @addstrategies #ADD #ADHD

ADD ADHD,add,adhd,adult add,adult adhd,attention deficit,medicine,medication,medications,drugs, alternatives,natural,herbs, vitamins,supplements,biofeedback, feedback,neurofeedback,natural,food coloring,food additives,diet,evaluation,diagnosis,treatment,therapy,counseling

You want to be sure of your ADD ADHD diagnosis.

Posted in add, adhd, diagnosis, medication, stimulants | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

“ADHD Science Says – – -” – – – ADD Tip O the Day 639

Some ADD ADHD Science

I’ve been collecting scientific tidbits.  Much of this is from Dr. Margolis, Dr. Mason and other articles:

ADD ADHD kids have a high risk of substance abuse.  The medications reduce that to about the normal average.   The same is true for adolescents and accidents and arrests.

Most people with ADD ADHD do not abuse the medications.

College kids with ADD ADHD do not abuse the stimulants but many share them or sell them.  Many non ADD ADHD kids use them inappropriately to help study. There is also misuse of other medications in colleges.

In most young adults without ADD ADHD stimulants make little improvement in performance but give people the illusion that they are doing better.  They can help college kids stay up all night but they won’t perform better.

Marijuana makes ADD ADHD worse.


Alpha blockers (non stimulants – clonidine, guanfacine) can help with hyperactivity, not so much with other symptoms.

Vyvanse is the best selling ADD ADHD medication.

The percentage of adults using the medications has risen to be similar to children.


In states that held teachers and schools accountable for performance before No Child Left Behind (NCLB), the % of low income children diagnosed with ADD ADHD has not risen recently.  In states where they were not  held accountable before NCLB it has, except in states where schools and teachers are not allowed to recommend meds.  (I am no fan of NCLB.  These teachers are under tremendous pressure, often without any means of achieving required goals.  Don’t get me started.)

When diagnosing ADD ADHD, we must rule out vitamin and iron deficiency, hyperthyroidism, vision and hearing problems, central auditory processing disorder (often present with ADD ADHD but not part of it).

Many people with other disorders (depression, bipolar, anxiety, etc.) also have ADD ADHD.  People with ADD ADHD have a higher incidence of those disorders, as well as substance abuse and criminality.

All patients with Tourettes syndrome also have ADD ADHD ( I had no idea!).

Brain Imaging:

In children with ADD ADHD there is less cortex in brain areas related to control of attention.  These areas do not light up with tasks as they do in vanillas.  There is also less activation of areas associated with inhibiting responses, but in some there is increased activity (go figure).

About half of these kids improve around adolescence. Their cortex has normalized. Not in the rest of us.


Bonus Links:


Science or hash?

Homey, the planner maven, on choosing a planner

Just went over 76,00 hits.  Yea all of us! and thank you.

@dougmkpdp @addstrategies #add #adhd

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, brain,cortex,progress,progression,medications,stimulants,clonidine,guanfacine,inhibition,medicine abuse,medication abuse,misuse,stimulant abuse,stimulant misuse

We with ADD ADHD are different!






Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, controversies, diagnosis, dysfunctions, medication, medicine, science, stimulants | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

ADD ADHD and Decisions — ADD Tip O the Day 638

With ADD ADHD we have more trouble making decisions than vanillas do.  There may be many reasons for this.  We have shaky self esteem and maybe fear making another mistake.  Maybe there are just too many choices.  But part of the problem is our misconceptions about decisions.

We act as though there is a Right Answer engraved in stone somewhere and it’s up to us to figure it out.

If it’s that hard to decide, then probably there’s no right answer.  It’s a toss up.

If you’ve done a reasonable amount of homework and made a decision and it turns out badly, that doesn’t mean you made a mistake.  It just means you made a reasonable choice that didn’t turn out well.

You can’t ask every adviser, read every article, google every possibility.  You’ll just get more confused and you’ll never make a decision.  You’ll miss a lot of opportunities.

So do a reasonable amount of homework,taking a reasonable amount of time.  Not too much (obsessing, procrastinating ) nor too little (impulsive). If you still can’t decide, flip a coin.  Then stick with your decision.  No second guessing.

Homey has some good suggestions about this, including listing pros and cons (I love lists) and setting limits  Set a time limit, a research limit, a choices to  consider limit.

All of this applies to the many choices we have to make, large and small, including setting priorities.


Quote O the Day:

“At some point you have to stop doing research and decide.”


Comment O the Day:

Every morning we wake up with a certain amount of psychic energy.  Every time we make a choice or decision or exercise any willpower, we burn some up.  Then there’s less available for the next challenge.  Aint that a booger?

from homey – on how to make decisions                              

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, stuck, paralyzed, stalled,can't start,can't get started,procrastinate,decide,decisions,choices, making choices,making decisions,psychic energy,willpower,will power

ADD ADHD work arounds.

Bonus Link:

Too many choices

#add #adhd @addstrategies @dougmkpdp




Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, attitudes, procrastination | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Some Days Are Just Like That When You Have ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 637

ADD ADHD Paralysis

Homey just wrote a good ADD ADHD post about having an unproductive day.  I’m bouncing off her post:

Some days I just can’t seem to get going, can’t get any traction.

Strategy 1:

Try to figure out what the problem is:

Do I have too much to do? Feeling overwhelmed? Something I don’t want to do? Didn’t get enough sleep?  Bad attitude?  I can use strategies (often small steps strategy) to deal with some of these.

That doesn’t always work.

Strategy 2:

Pick any very small very easy task and do it, just to break the deadlock and get moving.

That doesn’t always work.

Strategy 3:

“Screw it.”

Give up.  It ain’t gonna happen. Just let it go. Write the day off, goof off, relax, do nothing.  And be good to yourself, and no criticizing.  It’s OK.  Some days are just like that. 

Fortunately, not very many.


ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, stuck, paralyzed, stalled,can't start,can't get started, goof off

Accomplishments! Even with ADD ADHD.

Homey’s post

@dougmkpdp @addstrategies


Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

Relationships, Including Marriage, and ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 636

For ease, I’ll talk about marriage  but this applies to all intimate relationships.

Things they don’t tell you

Marriage is hard work.

Especially if one of you has ADD ADHD.

Quote O the Day

The only thing worse than being married is not being married.

Things I’ve Learned (Often the Hard Way)

Intimate relationships stir up our old stuff.  This give us the chance to work it out.  It also can lead to divorce.

The key to relationship is communication.  Easy to say.

A communication strategy- listen, ask questions, make sure you really understand the other’s point before responding.   Another:  be clear that feelings and perceptions are as important as fact.  Maybe more.

We each have different tolerances and desires about closeness/distance.  This underlies many relationship conflicts that may seem to be about something else.

We enter relationships with different expectations.  These are usually just assumed and unspoken and often unconscious.   The sooner they can be spelled out and negotiated the better.  There should be a law requiring premarital discussions of : how will we resolve disagreements, who does which chores, how will money be handled, how will children be raised, how will we deal with in-laws, what kind of sex life do we want.  Have you had these conversations yet?

You cannot make the other person happy, no matter how hard you try.  And that’s not your job.  But you  can make them unhappy.

Some things are not worth taking a stand or arguing about.  Some things are.  Strategy: let the little ones go.

Men and women are different. Learning about this can greatly improve your relationship.

The One Year Course On Marriage/Relationships

the ADHD effect on marriage – orlov
the dance of anger – lerner
men are from mars, women from venus – gray
love is never enough-beck
I dont want to talk about it – real
getting the love you want – hendricks
one of John Gottmans many books
disarming the past – lewis

ideally, read these together and discuss them as you go.

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, relationships,marriage,listen,books,listen,listening,negotiate,problems,conflicts,divorce

Does ADD ADHD make it harder to listen?


Bonus Links – these are worth checking out

5 things that can poison a relationship

adhd-doesnt-cause-divorce-denial-does from Melissa

20 things to remember if you love a person with ADHD.  from June

10 things not to do  from June


The site has just reached over 75,000 hits.  Thank you!   Yea!

@addstrategies,@dougmkpdp,#add,#adhd #marriage #relationships



Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

ADD ADHD and Reading? or “Reading” — ADD Tip O the Day 635

Sometimes I read and sometimes I “read.”


We ADDers have an increased incidence of dyslexia.  Both ADD ADHD and dyslexia result from faulty brain wiring.  Do I have dyslexia?  A lot of times I get numbers or letters transposed.  If I write down a phone number, I need a strategy – check again to see if I got it right, then check one more time to see if I can read it.

Also in my appointment book – I’m working on making sure that what I write is legible. Otherwise on Thursday I’ll spend half the day worrying about – 1:00 Ghdllsqs.  Unless my wife can figure it out for me.

But I’ve always read a lot and enjoy it.  I’m a good reader.  But sometimes I “read.”


Recently I wanted to buy a small edition of the new DSMV.  I looked it up on the net and found one – except the description didn’t sound quite right.  I was in a hurry and I was “reading” it, skimming over it. I do that a lot with things I’m not real interested in, especially if they’re long.   I just “read” it and  I didn’t listen to the little voice -“You need to check it again before you order it.”


It came.  It wasn’t at all what I wanted.

I learn the same lesson over and over – “Listen to the little voice!”


ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,dyslexia,reading,reading problems,strategies,cards,index cards,card system,to do list,to-do list,rules,strategy,problem,problem,appointment book solving,@addstrategies,@dougmkpdp,#add,#adhd

Life with ADD ADHD

Joke O the Day:

Did you hear about the dyslexic who walked into a rab –

Bonus Links:

Homey on motivation

James Clear on exercise

ADD ADHD and Reading

ADD ADHD and Learning Disabilities

Reading or Not with ADD ADHD


#add  #adhd   #dyslexia  #reading

@adultaddstrategies  @dougmkpdp


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Better Sleeping Through Technology, with or without ADD ADHD – ADD Tip O the Day 634

Sleep is an essential part of ADD ADHD management

So Jerry Bair gave me this guest post.  He is a tech whiz, so his approach is a little different.   Here it is:


Top 10 Tech Hacks To Give Your Body The Sleep It Deserves
July 30, 2015 by J.J. Bair Leave a Comment

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, symptoms,problems,sleep,insomnia,technology,procrastination

Did you know that you can improve your ability to gain new insights into complex problems by 50% with 8 hours of quality sleep?
I had two immediate thoughts when I first read this statistic. The first was: “Who in the world gets 8 hours of quality sleep these days?” The second was that they specifically mention “quality” in front of the word “sleep.” For those that don’t know, “quality sleep” is basically referring to the amount of time spent in REM or deep sleep, the stages where your body recharges and consolidates.
That being said, many people don’t have the option to sleep eight hours a night, and for those that do, many prefer to use that time for other things. I’ll admit that I’m guilty of the latter sometimes.
So, it stands that if we can’t get enough sleep in terms of quantity, then we should focus instead on quality. There are many natural and supplementary ways to do this, but being the “techy” I am, I figured it would be nice to show people what’s out there from a technology perspective.
Here you go…

Top 10 Tech Hacks for Better Sleep
1 Sleep as Android
Top 10 Tech Hacks for Better Sleep | Sleep as Android

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, symptoms,problems,sleep,insomnia,technology,procrastination

Use this app to keep track of your sleep quality and wake up in a light sleep phase so you’re less groggy (for Android)

2 Sleep Cycle alarm clock
Top 10 Tech Hacks for Better Sleep | Sleep Cycle alarm clock

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, symptoms,problems,sleep,insomnia,technology,procrastination

This is another smart alarm clock that tracks your sleep and wakes you in your lightest phase of sleep, so you wake up feeling rested. (for iOS)

3 ResMed S+
Top 10 Tech Hacks for Better Sleep | ResMed S+

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The S+ is a non-contact sleep system including a bedside sleep sensor, smartphone app, and web-based app. It tracks and analyzes your sleep patterns, then gives you personalized feedback on how you can improve your sleep.

4 Withings Aura
Top 10 Tech Hacks for Better Sleep | Withings AuraADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, symptoms,problems,sleep,insomnia,technology,procrastination

Withings Aura is similar to the S+ in that it’s also contactless and analyzes your sleep patterns to help you get the best sleep quality. This bundle comes with a sensor that slides under your mattress, a cool-looking bedside device with light/sound programs, and a smartphone app.

5 SleepRate
Top 10 Tech Hacks for Better Sleep | SleepRate

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, symptoms,problems,sleep,insomnia,technology,procrastination

The SleepRate Sleep Improvement Kit comes with a proprietary app (for iOS) and wireless heart rate sensor that goes across your chest. Wearing this sensor during your sleep helps assess your sleep patterns and possible sleep disruptions.

6 Hexoskin
Top 10 Tech Hacks for Better Sleep | Hexoskin


Hexoskin’s biometric shirt tracks a multitude of health and fitness metrics. Plus, it looks like something a Navy Seal would wear. As far as sleep tracking goes, wearing this to bed allows you to monitor resting heart rate, breathing, and even sleep positions.

7 Somnus Sleep Shirt
Top 10 Tech Hacks for Better Sleep | Somnus Sleep Shirt

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Say hello to the Nyx Devices Somnus Sleep Shirt, a biometric shirt which was born from technology made at MIT. This shirt has sensors that, when paired with the SleepLogger app, allow you to track and optimize the quality and quantity of your sleep.

8 Basis Peak
Top 10 Tech Hacks for Better Sleep | Basis Peak

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Is the Basis Peak the Ultimate Sleep and Fitness Tracker? It’s definitely up there. This sweet-looking smart watch monitors a multitude of fitness and sleep metrics, keeps you socially connected, provides built-in coaching, and streams your data to various other iPhone and Android apps. As far as sleep goes, it tracks sleep duration, REM and deep sleep and sleep disruptions to help you optimize your sleep quality.

9 Bulletproof Sleep Induction Mat


The Bulletproof Sleep Induction Mat claims to help you fall asleep faster, feel more refreshed, and improve overall energy levels. According to the site, It’s about the size of your pillowcase and can be rolled up when you need to take it on the road.

10 Low-Blue Nightlight
Top 10 Tech Hacks for Better Sleep | Low-Blue Nightlight

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Do you toss and turn, or wake up a lot in the middle of the night? The Low-Blue Night Light has a custom amber LED bulb that doesn’t emit any blue light which can trick your brain into thinking it’s still daytime. The F.lux desktop app works similarly in reducing blue light exposure in the evenings.
Better Sleep is awaiting…
Now that you’ve had a chance to go through the Top 10 tech hacks for better sleep, what were your favorites? Were there any missing that you think should’ve been on the list? Share your thoughts below.

Keeping pushing things off? Want to start taking some action? Get the free Breaking Through Procrastination Workbook!
Stop procrastinating. Take action, follow through, and start achieving success today.

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Thanks, Jerry.      

To sleep, or not to sleep, that is the ADD ADHD question.   And how?

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, symptoms,problems,sleep,insomnia,technology,procrastination,@addstrategies, @dougmkp #adhd #adhd

To sleep, or not to sleep, that is the ADD ADHD question.


@addstrategies, @dougmkp #adhd #adhd


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A Typical Day With ADD ADHD: Where in the world does the time go? — ADD Tip O the Day 633

My Typical ADD ADHD Day
Sleeping 6 hrs      Trying to sleep 2 hrs
Quiet time   .5 hr
Exercise  1 hr
Shower shave dress teeth bathroom  1hr
Eating 3 hrs                                       Thinking about eating – all the time
Looking for something I just had in my hand  1 hr
Looking for things I put where I could easily find them  1 hr
Doctor’ s appointment  1.5 hr
Errands  1.5 hr
Getting lost going to appointment or errands  1 hr
Walking dog  1 hr.
Trying to figure out what to do  1 hr
Getting things done  2 hr
Cleaning up messes I made doing things 1hr
Making explanations and/or apologies to wife  1hr

Total 25.5 hrs – No wonder I feel so busy!


It does help to do an occasional time analysis and see where our time is going.  Sometimes we realize some activities don’t have enough payoff to justify the time we’re giving them.   Also, if we make a list of our values, what’s important to us, then we can check to see if our time allotments are congruent with our values.


Bonus Links:

Homey on time management

Time and ADD ADHD

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, symptoms,problems,marriage,relationships,time,schedule,values

Eastern time, Central time, Mountain time, Western time, ADD ADHD time.


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Flyfishing with ADD ADHD, and LIfe As She Is — ADD Tip O the Day 632

Is fly fishing a metaphor for life with ADD ADHD?

I don’t think fly fishing is as hard as they say, but with ADD ADHD it sure can be harder.

When you are fly fishing, there are many things that could possibly happen.  You could catch fish.  Your could lose your fly in a tree, or weeds, or on rocks. Your line could get tangled up on itself, on your rod, on you.  You could hook a person. You could hook yourself.  In the hand, or the ear, or the face, or just your clothes or equipment.  You could break your rod. And you could fall in.

Do you see where I’m going with this?

Ain’t life just like that?


1. When I’m fishing I try to pay attention to everything I’m doing, all the time, not be off thinking about something else. Awareness, being present, being in the moment.

2. Do it right.  Every time. Not just kinda, not OK, but right.

3. Don’t get fancy.  That’s the other time, besides inattentive, that I tend to mess up.

4. Accept that untangling line and losing a fly now and then is just part of the process.  Revel in the time I actually catch some fish.  (Saturday, I caught 7, by the way, and five of them were BIG).

5. Remember that with patience you can usually untangle a tangled line.  Patience is not one of my strong points.  Sometimes you just have to cut the line and start over.

6. I try to be careful, but that’s not necessarily a good strategy for ADD ADHD.  Maybe it’s too general.

7. I talk to myself, talking my way through what I’m doing and through these strategies- “Ok, now do this right.

Application to real life (or, why am I telling you this?):

Can you think of any other situations in life where these strategies might apply? Would driving a car be an example? Any others?

Next post:

I have just read two posts that are so good I might just copy them.  Save me some time and trouble and I could do some more fishing.  Or would that not be following the strategies?  But I don’t think we need to be that compulsive all the time or in every situation.

One is Homey’s on motivation and the other is James Clear on The Rebound Effect. Really good!  And my wife just showed me another one- David Brooks on gratitude.  None of these are specifically about ADD ADHD but they all apply.  I will try to get them to you.


Twitter stuff: @addstrategies @dougmkp #add #adhd #life

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This is kind of like fly fishing with ADD ADHD.

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Your Genes and Your ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 631


Causes and Courses of ADD ADHD

Interesting article from JAMA Psychiatry July 2015 by Pingault, et al.  I don’t really understand the article, but here’s what I get out of it.

Genes and Environment and Their Interaction

Most psychiatric disorders have an environmental basis and a genetic basis.  The genetic basis usually consists of many genes, each adding only a small amount to the risk of developing the disorder.  In other words, if you don’t have some of these genes, you probably won’t get the disorder no matter what, and the more of them you have, the more likely you are to get it, depending on what happens in the environment. Scientists have spent a lot of time trying to find the single gene that causes a specific disorder and it’s generally not like that at all.

Epigenetics and Neurodevelopment

Some of the possible environmental factors for ADD ADHD (and other disorders) include pollution, alcohol, tobacco, toxins, medications, and stress.

This is epigenetics, where environmental factors affect the activity of the genes or even turn them on or off.

ADD ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder and studies show differences in our  brains compared to non ADD AHD brains.  So genes and environment affect the development of the developing brain and these factors continue to have effects after development is complete, except that it never really is.

The Course of ADD ADHD

Some ADD ADHD children get better or well, others persist or get worse.  One set of genes determines how severe the ADD ADHD will be at first and a different set determines what the longer term course will be.  Further, different sets of genes may be affecting the ADD ADHD at different times over development.  This is a new concept to me.

Hyperactive/impulsive symptoms tend to get better after early childhood.  Inattentive symptoms tend to get worse in early childhood and then persist or get slightly better. But these are just tendencies and the course can be quite different in different people.  The differences are thought to be correlated with different paths of development in the brain.  The thin cortex of ADD ADHD in certain areas tends to normalize with time in some people and not in others, and these latter are the ones with continuing symptoms.

Late Onset ADD ADHD?

Just to make it more complicated, another study by Moffitt indicates some adults develop ADD ADHD without having it in childhood and have a somewhat different course than the rest of us.  I am doubtful about this one.

New Concept

And I have just found a new concept. The genes continue to turn on and off (or get more or less active) throughout life, not just in earliest development.  So we are born with one set of genes and that doesn’t change, but the set of genes that are actually affecting you at 20 years old can be quite different from the ones affecting your brain development as a fetus, or at 5 or at 15.  Genetically, you could be like a whole different person.  Amazing!  Complicated!



We have some scientists out there.  Please offer corrections, clarifications and comments.  Thanks

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,genes,environment,epigenetics,causes,course,brain,cortex,progress,progression

Genes and ADD ADHD: those pesky little boogers!

genes2 Genes_DNA_chart[1]

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Can we blame our chromosomes for our ADD ADHD?


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ADD ADHD and the Benefits of Fidgeting — ADD ADHD Tip O the Day 630

Can’t Concentrate With ADD ADHD

We were at a Wagner opera, which I love.  But I had a lot on my mind (what else is new?) and I wasn’t able to concentrate on the opera.  I was missing a lot of the enjoyment of it.  Then I started tapping my foot in time to the music or even tapping when there was no music.  Suddenly I was able to focus!


I used to get all over our son Duane when he fidgeted at the dinner table.  Bugged me.  But was I fidgeting too?  I usually am.  Waiting at a restaurant, I play with the silverware until my wife tells me to stop.  Then I play with my water glass or jiggle my leg. Until she tells me to stop that.  Then I get the cork out of my pocket and squeeze it.  That doesn’t bother anybody.

Do you have some special fidgets to share?

The Science of Fidgeting

Recent posts describe an experiment with ADD ADHD children who were asked to do a difficult task. The  children who fidgeted more did better at the task than those who fidgeted less.

But with science, you have to be careful.  Did the fidgeting help with the concentration? I think so.  But what if the non-fidgeters were using up part of their concentration to sit still?



Fidgeting Helps

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, strategy,strategies,symptoms,fidget,fidgeting,focus,concentrate,science,jiggling

ADD ADHD medicine usually helps.

Longer Article On Fidgeting

@addstrategies @dougmkpdp

#ADD #ADHD #hyperactivity

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I know you have ÁDD ADHD, but could you stop that?

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With ADD ADHD, we’re gonna fidget!


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ADD ADHD and Marriage or Similar Relationships — ADD Tip O the Day 629

With ADD ADHD, Relationships Are Hard

In older couples, the divorce rate is twice that of vanillas.  According to Melissa Orlov, the major problem is undiagnosed and untreated ADD ADHD.

Quote O the Day:

“You have to be a superwoman to be married to a man with ADD.”

Martha Puryear, married to an ADDer

I wrote this down when she said it but I couldn’t find it til just now.  Know what I mean?

Problem O the Day

We have the cocktail hour every evening, together time.  It bugs my wife that I can’t sit still for it for very long.  But I do better if we’re outside or in a restaurant.   I think it’s the extra stimulation.


Sorry to say I haven’t really come up with one yet.  There’s gotta be a strategy for this.  Any suggestions?   The cork in my pocket helps sometimes.  I’m working on the problem.


5 things that can poison a relationship

adhd-doesnt-cause-divorce-denial-does from Melissa

20 things to remember if you love a person with ADHD.  from June

10 things not to do  from June

The ADHD Effect On Marriage  by Melissa Orlov



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Listening with ADD ADHD.

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The ADD ADHD listener in action. Think about it.


ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, symptoms,problems,marriage,relationships,listening,hearing,men

ADD ADHD and reliability. I am responsible, I’m just not reliable.


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A Brilliant New ADD ADHD Strategy! — ADD Tip O the Day 628

With ADD ADHD We Need Strategies, But – There’s  Puryear’s Principles of Human Nature #1:

When you struggle and struggle with a problem and you finally find something that works, the next thing you do is stop doing it.

The Rule

I need to keep my to-do list, which is on my red index card, down to five things.  Otherwise I feel overwhelmed, can’t decide where to start, and procrastinate.

The Problem

But I started putting everything on the red card – to-do’s, people’s names or phone numbers, ideas for the blog – anything that I needed to jot down.  I tried to stop doing this but I couldn’t.  My rule wasn’t working.  The red card was the easiest one to pull out of my pocket and the one with the most empty space and the one that isn’t semi-permanent.


So I thought of the strategy of getting a different colored card and using it  for writing things down.  Then later I could transfer them to the right card, or do them, or whatever.  But there are only so many colors and they were all assigned to some function.   Stuck!

The Strategy

Then I realized that my appointment book is always in my pocket also and it’s easy to find..  So I put a yellow sticky in the front of it.  Everything that needs jotting down goes on that. 


The Principles    

1. If you can identify something specific as a problem you can come up with a strategy to solve it.  

2, When what you’re doing isn’t working, do something different.         

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,strategies,cards,index cards,card system,to do list,to-do list,rules,strategy,problem,problem,appointment book solving,@addstrategies,@dougmkpdp,#add,#adhd

ADD ADHD Appointment book and cards. Essential tools.


Note: OK, you’re probably using tech for this.  How can you apply the strategy and keep your to- do list short?

Bonus Link:

from Pat- 10 things to do with your family – good understanding of people with ADD ADHD, and if your kid has it you may have it, too, and vice versa.  That’s genetics!



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Organizing with ADD ADHD, and Much Much More! by Homey— ADD Tip O the Day 627

Organizing with a planner for ADD ADHD

Homey is THE planner maven.  In her great blog about homemaking, cleaning, cooking, etc, she tells all about planners. 

Homey uses planners the way I use index cards, plus more.  A lot of her posts have  ADD ADHD application beyond what she’s writing about.  For example, her strategies for housecleaning are useful strategies for all kinds of things.

So I’m very pleased to have Homey’s guest post here.  See how you might apply this beyond just using a planner.


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Homey, the ADD ADHD Planner Maven

Five Ways A Planner Helps My ADD/ADHD


Time management has always been a struggle for me, but never more so than after I quit my job to stay home and raise my children.  Taking care of only myself was doable, but adding two children and a husband “tipped me over” as Doug would say.


I quickly learned that I needed help in order to make life work, and that help came in the form of my planner.  Thinking back, I always thought I used my planner really well but when I actually looked at my archived pages (I have them from 1993 on), that wasn’t the case at all.  My planner use was inconsistent.  But you know what?  For me, inconsistent was better than nothing.  Inconsistent planning helped me way more than having no planner at all.

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,homemaking,planner,homemaker,strategies,notebook

Homey’s Planner for ADD ADHD


In case you’re wondering how my planner helped me cope with ADD/ADHD, here are 5 ways (and I have more!):


1.       My planner helps me plan more realistically.  As is the case with most folks with ADD, we think we can do way more than we actually can.  Keeping my planner up to date and using a daily page helps me see how much time I actually have.  That helps me plan realistically.


2.       Putting information on paper gets it out of my head.  My head is a very busy place.  I have SO much going on in there and sometimes it seems like it might explode.  But if I take the time to write things down as I think of them, I clear the way for more thoughts and ideas and my brain never gets overloaded.  I trust my planner so I know if I put the information in there, I can let it out of my head because it’s safe in my planner.


3.       My planner helps me focus.  Like most of us, I either focus too much or not enough.  Having a plan for the day, and having it written down in my planner, helps me remember what I should be doing.  It’s not magic – having it written down doesn’t guarantee I’ll do it, but there’s a greater chance if it’s written down than if I’m winging it.


4.       My planner helps me keep track of time.   Doug talked about how he has calendars in several locations in his house because he has a slippery grasp of time.  I do, too.  If I’m not looking at my calendar on a regular basis, I can lose track of what day it is, what month it is, what year it is and what’s going on that I need to pay attention to.  And an event that’s four months away sneaks up on me and I’m not prepared. Having a planner helps me keep track of what time it is and what’s going on.


5.       My planner helps me sleep.  I struggle with insomnia.  I can’t turn my brain off at night.  But I’ve noticed that if I’ve spent some quality time with my planner before I go to bed at night and made a plan for the next day, I have a better chance of sleeping.  I know everything’s covered for today and I have a plan for tomorrow and my brain can relax a bit and let me sleep.

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,homemaking,planner,homemaker,strategies,notebook

Inside Homey’s ADD ADHD Planner


These are 5 ways my planner helps me with my ADD/ADHD.  I’m sorry to say that every now and then I get tired of using it (bored, probably) and tell my family I’m going to stop using a planner.  They freak out!  They know that my world and theirs falls apart when I don’t use a planner.


I used to think I had a great memory but my son pointed out to me that I had a terrible memory but I had a great system.  And my system is one of the most important strategies I use for managing my ADHD. 


Bonus Link:

Homey’s Hundred Helpful Housemaking Hints

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,homemaking,planner,homemaker,strategies
Homemaking with ADD ADHD
#add #adhd @dougmkpdp @addstrategies #homemaker #tck
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Procrastination, Stigma, and Heroes — ADD Tip O the Day 626

ADD ADHD and Procrastination and Father’s Day has come and gone.

I meant to do a great post for Father’s Day, about genetics and ADD ADHD.   I probably got mine from my grandfather.  My father maybe had a touch.  My mother could blurt out some truly awful things but I didn’t see anything else to suggest ADD ADHD.

I meant to do a great post for Father’s Day.  Have you heard of procrastination?

I was on top of July 4th though.

Let’s honor the American heroes who risked all they had, including their lives, in the cause of liberty.  And let’s honor their wives and children who were also at risk.

While we’re at it, let’s honor all those who sacrificed so much in the cause of civil rights, especially  Goodman, Scherner, Chaney, Medgar Evers and all those others who gave their lives.

Let’s honor the gay rights and GLBT activists who have also sacrificed much and achieved  so much.

So what about ADD ADHD?

Well, there is still stigma, isn’t there?  And how do we fight stigma and ignorance?  By coming out, like the GLBTs.  None of us have the right to tell anyone else that they should come out – it can be at risk of job, relationships, ridicule.  Everyone has to make their own decision.

But it is by our coming out that the stigma is defeated.


ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,coming out,stigma,risk

Who do we tell about our ADD ADHD and when?



#stigma  #endthestigma  #add #adhd @dougmkpdp @addstrategies



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Help With ADD ADHD From Technology— ADD Tip O the Day 625

Technologically Challenged

As most of you know, I am technologically challenged.  Therefore I’m very pleased to have this guest blog from Jerry Bair.  Please comment on your experience with using his tech recommendations or any others.


One Super Easy Tech Trick To Make Your To-Do Lists More Doable

Have you ever stared at a to-do list not knowing how you or when you were going to fit everything into your already-chaotic schedule? Are you burned out by constantly switching between your calendars, tasks, and to-do lists?

I’ll admit… Over the last six months, I’ve taken off a bit more than I can chew. I was really ambitious and took on several new adventures in my life, like martial arts, finishing my degree, and a revamp of my blog.

I felt confident that I could do it all, but quickly ran into some technical challenges – to-do lists in too many places, multiple calendars, missed meetings, tasks that seemed to disappear into a black hole… As a result, I was frequently stressed, irritable, and felt like I was always playing “catch-up”…

It’s no surprise. Having ADHD, I sometimes tend to be “too” positive and underestimate the amount of involvement or work required for new initiatives. However, being a techy, challenges like these often inspire me with ideas for potential solutions. With this particular problem, I realized I was racking up my to-do list, but not scheduling a time to do many of the tasks, which created tons of schedule conflicts and many things not even getting done. My most productive days, like most people, are when I create a task, and slot it to get done. This was an essential insight to the solution below.

My top time & task managers:
• Wunderlist – to-do list manager supported on multiple platforms   Wunderlist
• Google Calendar – my preferred calendar on-the-go  Google Calendar
• MS Outlook – my desktop calendar at work and home (synchronized with GCal)  GCal       MS Outlook

Keeping up with these seems like it would be pretty simple, but like any technology, when you focus too much on one, you tend to neglect the other. My solution: Send my Wunderlist tasks to my Google Calendar. I already have my Google Calendar visible within Outlook, so this step would essentially unify them. In short, it would let me see all to-do’s, tasks, and meetings in one single calendar view.

The benefits of this:
• instant visibility to important tasks
• easier planning at the start of your day
• a consistent view across all your personal and mobile devices
• faster prioritization of upcoming tasks and meetings

I do realize that there are some people who have twice the number of calendar feeds as I do, and therefore, may use a different approach to their workflow. However, if you’re looking for a way to bridge the gap, look no further!

Here is the specific link to synchronizing Wunderlist with Google Calendar, Outlook and/or iCal: link[Estimated time to complete: <5 minutes]

Important Note: As of June 2nd, 2015, Wunderlist has joined the Microsoft family, so expect to see a lot more functionality and feature integration in the near future!

What type of time and task management tools do you use? How do you bridge the gap and stay on top of both your meetings and to-do’s?

If you have trouble with procrastination, follow-through, or even basic time management, download the free Breaking Through Procrastination Workbook at


I hope you liked this and will comment. @addstrategies  @dougmkpdp  #add #adhd


ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,adult ADD,adult ADHD, ADD,ADHD,adult ADD,adult ADHD,time management,strategy,strategies,to do list,to-do list,technology,wunderlist,google calendar,calendar,GCal

Another gift moment from ADD ADHD

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, organize, stimulants | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

Attitudes in ADD ADHD – Warning: Intimate Material, Viewer Discretion Advised— ADD Tip O the Day 624

Warning – Intimate Material, Viewer Discretion Advised

We with ADD ADHD tend to say, and do, inappropriate things. This material may be inappropriate, but it’s such a good illustration of the effect of attitude that I have to share it.


The new age theory is that we create our own reality. Here is an example.

Since I closed my practice I don’t take showers as often.  I don’t think frequent showers are good for our skin, especially in this dry climate. And I understand that the French don’t bathe daily.  But my main reason was my ADD ADHD obsession with time.  I dreaded and resented the loss of the time it took to  shower. The time loss is what I focused on.

But my wife was not entirely happy with my new approach.  So I’ve resumed  the daily shower.  But I changed my focus.  The warm water feels really good on my skin. I focus on that. So now, instead of resentment and dread, I enjoy the showers and look forward to them.

It’s about attitude.  And that is one of the things we have some control over.


PS I hope this hasn’t offended anyone. We’re all adults, after all.

Bonus Link:

Jenna’s tips on coping with stress

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,adult ADD,adult ADHD, ADD,ADHD,adult ADD,adult ADHD,time,time management,strategy,strategies,attitude
With ADD ADHD it’s hard to get started some days.
Posted in add, ADD strategies, ADHD strategies, attitudes, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

The ADD ADHD Trap of Expectations — ADD Tip O the Day 623

What Can I Expect?

With ADD ADHD we have so many things we’re interested in and it’s hard to say no to any of them.  It’s hard to say no to ourselves.

My daily routine includes brushing my teeth, quiet time, and exercise.  I was missing the quiet time occasionally but then my spiritual adviser told me it was “non-negotiable.” I’ve used “non-negotiable” as my motto ever since and rarely miss a day.

I actually can’t exercise every day either, but by having that as a goal I get in at least 4 times a week.

I had a goal of doing some guitar, Spanish, book marketing and writing every day.  At bedtime I would record in my notebook – E,G,Sp,Mkt,Wrt  – or whichever ones I had gotten done.

It’s taken me several years to realize that this is absolutely impossible.  My expectations were just unrealistic.


With ADD ADHD we not only want to do everything, we also expect way too much of ourselves.


Goals need to be reasonable and achievable.  Otherwise we just set ourselves up for frustration and demoralization.

It works better to set goals too low rather than too high.  Then we can feel good about achieving them and maybe we can go on and do more –     “Wow! I not only got it done but I exceeded my goal!”

Instead of trying to do each one of those every day (guitar, Spanish, book marketing, and writing) I’m  scheduling one of them each day and trying to be sure that that one gets done at least.

Irrelevant Note:

I titled this “expectations” because that’s really the focus of it and I’ve written a lot on goals recently.


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Multitasking – one of the ADD ADHD gifts?

A whole bunch of other posts on goals (or expectations).  Do you really expect to check them all out?


Can we use goals?

goals and Self Abuse

goals and overdoing

Goals #2

Goals #3

Posted in add, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, organize, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

What Having ADD ADHD Is Like — ADD Tip O the Day 622

Living With ADD ADHD

One of the painful things about having ADD ADHD is that people who don’t have it can’t understand what it’s like.  They may recognize some of the symptoms and problems and they may know what it’s like to live with someone with ADD ADHD, but-

they can’t imagine what it’s like living with it.

“Sonny, I don’t have time to explain marriage to you, and even if I did, you wouldn’t understand. They tried to explain it to me and I didn’t understand it and if I tried to explain it to you, you wouldn’t understand it either.”

        One petty crook to another younger petty crook, a paraphrased quote from Friends of Eddie Coyle by George V Higgins.  Part played by Robert Mitchum in the movie.

So, I’m saying it’s kind of like that with ADD ADHD too.

But there are some pretty good descriptions we could share with them.  Worth a try?

      What having ADD ADHD is like

      Lisa On Life with ADD  – (First of Three Parts)


Denial of ADD ADHD

This problem of not understanding is related of course to the problem of those who deny the existence of ADD ADHD.  Part of the difference is that it’s hard for me to have any sympathy for those people.


Bonus Link:

Nice collection of ADD ADHD Tips


#add #ADHD @addstrategies

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, adult ADD,adult ADHD,relationships,understanding,What ADD is like,what ADHD is like,living with ADD,living with ADHD,#ADD,#adhd,#@addstrategies
So you know all about so called ADD ADHD?


Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD problems, controversies, marriage, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

ADD ADHD and Choices: What to do!? What to do!? – – – ADD Tip O the Day 621

Too Many Options:

There are so many ways to market ADD ADHD books.

I can:

1. do my ADD AHD blog posts Tuesday and Saturday.This is hard work but I enjoy it and I think it’s helping some people. I’m not sure that it’s selling books.

2. put my posts on Facebook.  This seems to attract a lot of hits to the blog. Is it selling books?

3. same thing for LinkedIn.

4. StumbleUpon doesn’t seem to do anything anymore. So I quit.

5.  try to learn how to use Twitter #add #adhd.  I have two addresses (?) but I’m not sure what they are #addadults #adhdadults #addstrategies #adhdstrategies.  And I’m not clear how this works.

So I’ve just ordered three books about Twitter.  Now I’ll have trouble deciding which one to start with and sticking with it.  Why three?  Because I’m not good at making choices and because anything I do I tend to overdo and because I don’t have the patience to just get one and then if I’m not happy with it to order another. Does that sound like maybe – oh, I don’t know – ADD ADHD or something?

Fish Or Cut Bait

The internet is filled with good posts with all kinds of marketing tips. I keep saving them into a folder.  I’ve also downloaded lots of  good free booklets into the folder. I just haven’t had time to read any of them.  That folder must be bulging now.

I’m like my friends who have a great collection of ADD ADHD books but haven’t read any of them.  (That’s why I wrote very short chapters and encouraged folks to read just a bit at a time.)

Maybe its time to fish or cut bait.  In other words, stop collecting information and start using the information I have.

I am not good at making choices or setting priorities.

But for the moment I’ve decided to focus on Twitter.  (Focus???) I’m committing to learning how to use it.

We’ll see.

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, adult ADD,adult ADHD,choices,options,decisions,procrastination,avoiding,getting started,committed,committing

I couldn’t decide which ADD ADHD picture to use.


Bonus Links:

So Many Choices

More On Choices

Even More On Choices Plus a Really Good Long Article on Choices and Willpower- a Bonus Bonus

Question O the Day:

So how did you choose about the links?

Extraneous Notes O the Day That I Chose Not to Include In This Post But Here They Are Anyway:

I also have three other websites that I think I need to do something with.  But lets just stick with Twitter for the moment, right?

I’ve done the same collecting of free guitar lesson posts.  When will I ever use them?

You’d be amazed at the number of books,with discs included, on blues guitar that I have.

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, adhd, ADHD strategies, procrastination | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

ADD ADHD and Inattention and Quite Natural Mistakes — ADD Tip O the Day 620

 Inattention and ADD ADHD

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,gift,adult ADD,adult ADHD, ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,confusion,spaced out,spacey,inattention

This is the dishwasher.







ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,gift,adult ADD,adult ADHD, ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,confusion,spaced out,spacey,inattention

This is the trash can.






They’re both in the kitchen.

You open a door on both of them.

You put things in both of them.

Do you see where I’m going with this?


A Natural Mistake

They really do look a lot alike.  Don’t they?

So wouldn’t it be only natural that someone might ——–?

Or do you think maybe it has something to do with ADD ADHD?


If we are boys, we  are more likely to have the mixed type of ADD ADHD.

As we pass adolescence, our hyperactivity diminishes, although it doesn’t vanish.  There is usually enough of it left to be annoying to other people.  But our inattention symptoms predominate and cause us the most trouble.

Girls are more likely to have the inattentive type from the beginning.  And they may get worse in young adulthood and even worse after menopause.  But let’s hope not.

The meds can help but we still need strategies, and even then we are unlikely to achieve perfection.


Bonus Links:

The ADHD Brain – good

Jenna on Time Wasters – excellent!

Sad Note O the Day:

I’m sorry to see that Bryan plans to shut down Adderworld.

Its been a great site for ADD ADHD and Bryan has been very helpful to me.

Thanks Bryan.

Attempt to Use Twitter O the Day:

This #ADD #ADHD post is supposed to show up on #adhdadults and #adhdstrategies or #addstrategies.  I’m still a little confused.  Do you know something about Twitter?




Posted in add | 3 Comments

ADD ADHD and Dyscoordination — ADD Tip O the Day 619

Clumsy, Clumsy, Clumsy – Is It ADD ADHD?

I reached for the glass, and…

– I reached too far and I knocked it over.

– I didn’t notice the glass between it and me and I knocked it over.

– I picked it up and it slipped out of my hand.

– I picked it up and my hand jerked and the wine went all over the table.

– I started to drink but I missed my lips and the wine went all over my shirt.

etc. etc. etc.

Anybody know what I’m talking about?

The ADD ADHD Brain

Clumsy is not in the list of symptoms of ADD ADHD but they often run together.

If we understand the science that shows that ADD ADHD is related to problems with the cerebellum and the basal ganglia and the circuits between them, it makes sense.  Both the cerebellum and the basal ganglia have the job of coordinating our movements.

Also, doesn’t it make sense that if part of our brain is miss wired it might have other effects in addition to causing our ADD ADHD and other parts of our brain might be miss wired as well?

A Helpmate – That’s One Strategy

“Be careful, Doug!”

My wife has the task of watching over me and trying to avert disasters.

“Move your glass back from the edge of the table, Doug.”  “Better tuck your napkin round your neck, Doug.” “You’re dragging your sleeve through your food, Doug!”

“Oh! You did it again, Doug.”

God only knows what it would be like without the supervision.  On the other hand, I don’t always fully appreciate it.


Quote the Day: 

(After I asked my wife to describe what it’s like being married to someone with ADD ADHD) –

“Its indescribable!”

Bonus Links:

Bryan’s book Ten Things I Hate About ADHD

Bryan’s important message, good news and bad news about ADD ADHD

Lots about ADD ADHD – seems like the arguers think it has to be either meds or strategies.  Why not both?

Dr. Goodwin said that the purpose of the meds is to help you focus enough to use the strategies.

Clumsy and ADD ADHD      an old post, I didn’t just get clumsy yesterday. @ADD @ADHD @ADDstrategies @ADHDadults

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, strategy,strategies,science,brain,neurology,circuits,cerebellum,basal ganglia,clumsy,uncoordinated,awkward,dyscoordinated
Why did you move my stuff again!?  You know that I can’t find —.
I did?




Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, dysfunctions, medication, relationships, science, stimulants, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 15 Comments

Who’s the Expert On ADD ADHD? — ADD Tip O the Day 618

With ADD ADHD We Need Experts

Who would you nominate?

Long Definition of Expert:

An expert  is someone widely recognized as a reliable source of technique or skill whose faculty for judging or deciding rightly, justly, or wisely is accorded authority and status by peers or the public in a specific well-distinguished domain. An expert, more generally, is a person with extensive knowledge or ability based on research, experience, or occupation and in a particular area of study.

Short Definition of Expert:

a person who has special skill or knowledge in some particular field; specialist; authority.

(Would we have to define “widely” or “extensive” or “special”?)

My Expertise

I’ve studied ADD ADHD a lot and have worked with ADD ADHD patients.   Mainly though, I have lived with it. And lived with it. And lived with it.

I don’t consider myself a scientific expert although I make an effort to stay knowledgeable.  And I don’t know a lot about ADD ADHD in kids.  (When I was a kid I didn’t know I had it.)

Some scientific experts are Drs. Farone, Barkley, Parker,  Mason and  Levin.  They don’t always agree with each other but seem to know what they’re talking about, based on scientific studies and not just opinion.

And most certified  coaches know about ADD ADHD.

If I am an expert it would be on strategies.


If we have ADD AHD we need strategies to help us cope and make our life better.  But we need to know how to devise strategies  and tweak them to fit our unique selves and unique situations, and we need to know how to use them.  I think those are the things I know something about.  An expert!

Should be, after all this time.

So, Tip O the Day:

Try to be sure your “expert” knows what they’re talking about.

Tip O the Day Number Two

It is up to you to educate yourself about ADD ADHD and become an expert too.  So, you’re reading this blog right now. Good for you!


ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, strategy,strategies,science,expert,knowledge

ADD ADHD Strategies don’t always work out well.

Quote O the Day From Homey: 

” I only like change when it’s my idea & I only like noise when I’m making it.”

Bonus Links:

From Homey’s collection of tips: May 2015 Tips, Tricks & Techniques | Homemakersdaily

Strategies for Using Strategies

Stupid Question O the Day:

Does this do anything  #ADD #ADHD ? 

I’m not an expert on Twitter. I have to wait until my grandson gets back in town.

Irrelevant Comment O the Day:

The blog just reached 70,000 hits!   I’m excited!

Thank you all!


Posted in add, adhd, ADHD strategies, educate yourself, science, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

ADD ADHD and Focus, Or Not — ADD Tip O the Day 617

Can’t Focus?

Sometimes it’s said that those of us with ADD ADHD can’t focus. I believe it’s more accurate to say we can’t control our focus.

Often I can’t focus on things that are important but I can hyperfocus on other things.


Hyperfocus can be very useful. I can get a lot done. But it can be a real problem because I can’t control it. I can’t choose what to hyperfocus on and I can’t un hyperfocus when I need to.

I may have trouble focusing on this post and getting it started and sticking with it once I start instead of getting distracted into several other directions. But I can hyperfocus on a computer game for hours even though I eventually realize it’s a total waste of time.

” But just one more game. I bet I can do better this time.”

 “Focus Center” – A Hypothetical Part Of Our Brain

Most people’s  focus center is turned on  if something is important. 

Ours is turned on if something is personally interesting, novel, challenging or has an immediate heavy deadline and consequence. It may or may not be important.

Important is not important to us.

Strategies and Medications

The purpose of the medications is to help us focus.

Many of our strategies are aimed at dealing with this focus problem.


Bonus Links

On focus and hyper focus from carolyn

“10 surprising signs you might have ADHD”       Not so surprising to me, but a good article

Question O the Day:

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD,focus,hyperfocus,strategy,strategies,brain


 Am I an expert on ADD ADHD?

I hope to address this question soon.

I hope to address a lot of things.

If I can just focus.


or learn to use twitter?  #ADD #ADHD

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, controversies, distraction, stimulants | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

Leave of Absence — No ADD ADHD Tip O the Day

I’ll be doing prison ministry Thursday thru Sunday so my next post, God willing, will be next tuesday.

But here are some good links i’ve been saving.

Thank you for your support, interest, reviews, and comments.


ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, ,gift,adult ADD,adult ADHD, ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, strategy,strategies,symptoms,problems,dysfunction,problems

Another gift moment from ADD ADHD


Time management tip from Dana

From Homey – another way to look at the ADD ADHD strategy of small steps

Attitude magazine on ADHD and food –  I think most of the information here is not bad; healthy diet is good for anyone, but i think most of it is not supported by scientific evidence.  Still, everyone is different, and some of these things might make a difference for some people with ADD ADHD.


The full food coloring report

Question O the Day

Do you think I’m  being just a wee tiny bit over compulsive posting this instead of just waiting til Tuesday?

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, clutter, dysfunctions, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

ADD ADHD Terms and Definitions Controversy – ADD Tip o the Day 616

my mind  Joe recently posted on the net:


GratefulEnergy Health Guide September 09, 2013
  • Before His Death, Father of ADHD Admitted it Was An Over-Diagnosed Disease”

(well, anyway, i just came across it recently)

So, is it not an disease, or is it an over-diagnosed disease?

Starting from there, the article dives deeper into BS.  But what is a disease?  And what is ADD ADHD?

There’s a lot of confusion about terms.  There certainly is in my mind.  So I did a little research (a little).  Here are some of the results:


 any deviation from or interruption of the normal structure or function of any body part, organ, or system that is manifested by a characteristic set of symptoms and signs and whose etiology, pathology, and prognosis may be known or unknown.


 a derangement or abnormality of function; a morbid physical or mental state.


 not normal; contrary to the usual structure, position, condition, behavior, or rule.


 management and care of a patient or the combating of disease or disorder.


I don’t find any of these definitions very satisfying.  How about you?

I don’t think medicine has any generally accepted definitions of these terms.  But most of us have our own favorite definitions; there’s just not a lot of agreement.

I think in order to be a disease or a disorder, it has to cause some kind of problem?

The DSM V calls it “Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder”.   That’s OK.  Personally I call it ADD ADHD and I call my personal version ADD.

The DSM V requires for the diagnosis that it “interferes with functioning or development.”  That’s good, tho I’m not sure what interferes with development means?

Then there are number of criteria that have to be present before the diagnosis can be made, including symptoms of hyperactivity and inattention.  Which cause problems.  You see what I’m saying?

A while back there were a bunch of posts about ADD ADHD being a “gift”.  Oh, my.  And of course there’s the group that says it’s just normal active kids.  Oh, my.  And the smaller group who say they have it but wouldn’t want the boring life of being normal. I have some good days, partly due to my Daytrana, and might get close to being “normal” for a little while.  I’ve never found it “boring”, just calm, productive and fulfilling.

But we’re all different, aren’t we?

I hope to address the issues of cause and treatment soon, if i can get a little more focused – a little closer to “normal”. “Boring” I think I could live with.


Puzzled Note O the Day:

I forgot the hashtags.  Here we go: #ADD #ADHD #YourLifeCanBeBetter . I don’t like the way they look in the title.  The video helped some but I’m still confused.

Quiz O the Day:

Did you notice that I’m fishing for your comments on these issues? 


Joe’s post

Lynne on exercise – Genuine good stuff. Read the comments.  Question – is exercise “treatment”?





Posted in add, adhd, attitudes, controversies, diagnosis, dysfunctions, educate yourself, educate yourself, science | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

How I Screwed Up A Perfectly Good ADD ADHD Strategy – – – ADD Tip O the Day 615 #ADD #ADHD

Puryear’s principles of human nature (this is number two or three or something)

We struggle with a problem until we find something that works. Then we quit doing it.    Or we screw it up.

That’s what I did.


I got off structure  on vacation. When I got back, I tried to put my Daily Priority Strategy back into effect but I’ve been having trouble doing it. It was working before vacation. I’ve just realized I screwed it up by putting too many things in each day.


ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, strategy,strategies,symptoms,problems,schedule,structure,human behaviormom hook up

The Post Vacation Schedule

The strategy is to have ONE priority each day and get that done before anything else. Then if I do nothing else, at least I’ll have that done, and by the end of the week I will have done something in each  major categories.

But, if I choose too many “priorities”, then they aren’t priorities at all.

ADD ADHD Problems

There’s too many things I want to do.

I have trouble setting priorities.

When a strategy is working, I often quit using it or screw it up.

Do you see where this is going?


I made a new schedule and tried to put only one thing in each day. As you see, I only partly succeeded, but it’s an improvement, and I can rationalize why I have two on some days. (But it’s still a mistake. Oh, well.)

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, strategy,strategies,symptoms,problems,schedule,structure,human behavior

The New Schedule


The Hope

Now if I can just stick to it!  The rule is that the priority(s) of the day gets done before I can do anything else.  (Frank commented that the problem is that we don’t keep commitments to ourselves – he’s onto something there.)


Bonus Links:

From Homey – another way to look at the ADD ADHD strategy of small steps


Experiment O the Day

I’m trying to learn about hashtags, but I don’t understand them.

Do I just put #ADD # ADHD #adultADD anywhere, like this?

And that does something????    Advice is welcomed.



Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, ADHD problems, ADHD strategies, attitudes, dysfunctions, organize, strategies | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Shannon’s Approach to the ADD ADHD Time Problem — ADD Tip O the Day 614

-and Shannon’s comment was so good I’m just posting it here:

“Agreed. Time is a problem! And schedule what’s important!

What I’m trying out is putting those things in a non-scheduled category of my todo list until they are important enough to me to move to the scheduled part. I’m using the 5 categories published in “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Adult ADHD” by EIleen Bailey & Donald Haupt, M.D.. First book I bought; Doug’s was the second. My time management system is a mix of tips from both, and of course it’s complicated so I’ll (try to!) just talk about the bits that are important for this topic – the categories I use and how I move things between them.

Categories are (paraphrasing), from highest priority to lowest:

Absolutely Urgent = Important to me, my family or my job (and thus things I want to do) and have a due date.
Urgent = Important to me, my family or my job (and thus things I want to do) and don’t have a due date.
Chores = Things I don’t necessarily want to do, but have to do anyway (if chores are important to me, my family or my job then they go on the Absolutely Urgent or Urgent list; if cyclical like housework they get repeating daily/weekly/monthly due dates)
Maybe = Things I would like to do, but they’re not really important, and it doesn’t matter when you do them
Dreams, Wishes & Ideas = Things I might like to do, not important, not time sensitive

I enter my todo items into Wunderlist, an app I like because it syncs across all of my devices and my laptop, and it does most of what I like in a todo app. I then use the “due today” view from Wunderlist each morning to create my 5 item working list. Anything due that day automatically pops up, and I don’t have to see (and worry about) stuff due later. It gets first priority on the working list. If there are spots left on the working list, or if I get through the working list early, next priority goes to Urgent items, and so on down the list.

Stuff like guitar lessons (I’d love to get back into and better at playing too!) start off in Maybe. Once they’re in that category, I tend not to think about them in “as soon as” terms anymore. They’re recorded, and I know that they will come up in my daily process when I have time for them.

If they start to feel more important to me (if I am more often feeling a lack in my life because I’m not doing them, if I find myself thinking about them more often, etc…) then they get moved up the category list to Urgent. If something important to me spends too much time on the Urgent list, I assign it a due date and move it to the Absolutely Urgent list. That’s the part that I’m still trying to work out – how much time on the Urgent list is too much time? For stuff that’s important to my family or job, I use Doug’s 3 day rule – if it’s on there for more than that people are waiting too long and a due date is assigned. But if it’s “just” important to me, like guitar lessons? I don’t know. I’m trying to go with how urgent it feels to me right now, but I’ve only been on my meds a couple of months and I’m still getting the hang of things in that context. Any suggestions are welcome!

So that kink’s not worked out yet, but I am finding this system is keeping me away from “as soon as” thinking, and once something like guitar lessons makes it onto my Absolutely Urgent list, it is scheduled and fiercely defended. So it’s working so far in that sense.”

Thank you, Shannon.

I especially like your comment about “scheduled and fiercely defended.”  We need to fiercely defend our schedules.  We need to learn to say “No”, to ourselves and to others.

ADD,ADHD,attention deficit,adult ADD,adult ADHD, strategy,strategies,symptoms,problems,time,dysfunction,busy,pressure,rush,hurry,attitude,illusion,schedule,scheduling,saying no

You have the whole day ahead of you. But, how can it go so fast!?


Note O the Day:

If someone makes a request of you, and you say “No”, and they get upset, then it wasn’t a request, it was a demand.

Bonus Links:

On the usefulness of  “No”

Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!

Staying On Task