With ADHD , everything is much harder, especially relationships.
We disappoint, forget, let down. We get preoccupied, don’t finish, don’t get started. We blurt out, do and say socially inappropriate things. We run into things, knock things over, drop things. Whew!
Do you think we might be hard to live with?
Out of date stero types: man brings home the bacon, woman takes care of the house and raises the children, (all by herself). This is changing and the men in recent generations do much better. (Way to go, Will!)
If you got along well before marriage, that doesn’t mean you’ll get along well after marriage. If you didn’t get along well before marriage, it’s highly unlikely you’ll get along well after. If you marry thinking the person will change you may be right, but it’s unlikely to be for the better.
Once we end a marriage or relationship, we often find someone else who turns out to be pretty much like the one we just left, and we have the same problems.
If it bothers your partner, it is a problem even if it doesn’t make sense. You do not want your partner to be bothered.Try to remember to treat your partner with kindness and respect. Even when it is difficult.
Get counseling. A neutral third-party can be can make the difference.
Story O the Day:
TV show years ago: Host interviewing couple with many years of marriage, “What’s your secret?”
Husband: “When we first married, we agreed that I would make the big decisions and she’d make the small decisions. We haven’t had any big decisions yet.”
Constructive arguing rules – very important. “Plan” to post next time.
Three Quotes O the Day:
We’re all crazy, except me and you, and sometimes I’m not so sure about you.
The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing.
Ann LamottThe only thing worse than being married is not being married.
Personal Notes O the Day:
It was actually my wife who suggested my first strategy, “Always put your keys on the front table,” which started off my understanding of and devising of strategies. She was tired of finding them for me.
If I did all the things I’m supposed to do for my health I’d have no time to do anything else.
Help! Mrs. P is requesting suggestions for funny books, movies, etc. Any suggestions would be welcome.
Funny books: Try looking for Fowl Language, I think it’d be righ up your alley (and your wife’s), even if it’s about raising small children.
I don’t know if “Lunar Baboon” has released any books, but I think you’d like it too,
thank you for your suggestions and for all your contributions. Merry Christmas and best wishes
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Merry Christmas to you and your family too!
This is a good reminder to be mindful of or significant other.
“If it bothers your partner, it is a problem even if it doesn’t make sense. You do not want your partner to be bothered.”
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bj- yes, but it can be hard to do, especially if the partner has ADHD. still —
thank you for commenting
Good one, Doug! ❤️
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thank you, and for all your patience and tolerance.