A Change in Plans— ADHD Tip O the Day 945

I had today’s blog ready to post, well almost. It’s great to stay ahead. Then I got these two inputs and I have to share them with you. The link needs to be read slowly and with thoughtfulness (With ADHD?-well, try. I’ve read it three time and am trying to absorb it.)

Dealing with it  https://captainscourageous.net/blog/lifechangingsituations


From Richard Rohr: This explains a lot about “them” — and us.

People can’t see what they can’t see. Their biases get in the way, surrounding them like a high wall, trapping them in ignorance, deception, and illusion. No amount of reasoning and argument will get through to them, unless we first learn how to break down the walls of bias. . . .

Confirmation Bias: We judge new ideas based on the ease with which they fit in with and confirm the only standard we have: old ideas, old information, and trusted authorities. As a result, our framing story, belief system, or paradigm excludes whatever doesn’t fit.

Complexity Bias: Our brains prefer a simple falsehood to a complex truth.

Community Bias: It’s almost impossible to see what our community doesn’t, can’t, or won’t see.

Complementarity Bias: If you are hostile to my ideas, I’ll be hostile to yours. If you are curious and respectful toward my ideas, I’ll respond in kind.

Competency Bias: We don’t know how much (or little) we know because we don’t know how much (or little) others know. In other words, incompetent people assume that most other people are about as incompetent as they are. As a result, they underestimate their [own] incompetence, and consider themselves at least of average competence.

Consciousness Bias: Some things simply can’t be seen from where I am right now. But if I keep growing, maturing, and developing, someday I will be able to see what is now inaccessible to me.

Comfort or Complacency Bias: I prefer not to have my comfort disturbed.

Conservative/Liberal Bias: I lean toward nurturing fairness and kindness, or towards strictly enforcing purity, loyalty, liberty, and authority, as an expression of my political identity.

Confidence Bias: I am attracted to confidence, even if it is false. I often prefer the bold lie to the hesitant truth.

Catastrophe or Normalcy Bias: I remember dramatic catastrophes but don’t notice gradual decline (or improvement).

Contact Bias: When I don’t have intense and sustained personal contact with “the other,” my prejudices and false assumptions go unchallenged.

Cash Bias: It’s hard for me to see something when my way of making a living requires me not to see it.

Conspiracy Bias: Under stress or shame, our brains are attracted to stories that relieve us, exonerate us, or portray us as innocent victims of malicious conspirators. [1]

Richard again: I don’t know any other way to be free of all these biases except through the contemplative mind. I see almost every one of them within myself–at least at some point in my life. I also believe there are enough good-willed people out there who, if presented with a list of these biases, have the freedom to investigate, “How can I let go of that? How can I move beyond that?” [2]

[1] Brian McLaren, Why Don’t They Get It? Overcoming Bias in Others (and Yourself) (Self-published: 2019), e-book. 

[2] Adapted from Brian McLaren, Jacqui Lewis, with Richard Rohr, “Why Can’t We See?,” October 5, 2020, in Learning How to See, episode 1 (Center for Action and Contemplation: 2020), podcast, MP3 audio.


Quote O the Day:

“It is as it is.”

From The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance


Personal Notes O the Day:

  1. Not to brag, but yesterday I went nearly three hours without dropping anything. 
  2. I still plan to address more of my doubts, and T’s question about our making excuses, but I’ve been busy, and I have a sore finger, and my computer isn’t working right, and -.
  3.  Planning to is great, but it’s no substitute for doing.
  4. Doing lots of editing on the novel.  I’m amazed at how much I’m cutting out, unnecessary words especially. On draft twenty one, but it won’t be ready to publish.  Maybe twenty two??
  5.  The new ADHD book is on hold til the novel is done.
  6. I won an argument, once.
#ADHD, #adhdstrategies,  @dougmkpdp



Use Everything

About doug with ADHD

I am a psychiatric physician. I learned I have ADHD at age 64, and then wrote two ADHD books for adults, focusing on strategies for making your life better. I just published my first novel, Alma Means Soul. Your Life Can Be Better; strategies for adults with ADD/ADHD available at amazon.com, or smashwords.com (for e books) Living Daily With Adult ADD or ADHD: 365 Tips O the Day ( e-book). This is one tip at a time, one page at a time, at your own pace. It's meant to last a year. As a child, I was a bully. Then there was a transformation. Now I am committed to helping people instead abusing them. The Bully was published in January, 2016. It's in print or e book, on Amazon.
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12 Responses to A Change in Plans— ADHD Tip O the Day 945

  1. Pingback: Assumptions, Premises, and Illusions — ADHD Tip O the Day 954 | ADDadultstrategies

  2. Ken Powell says:

    I think I have an anti-community bias – I see things differently to just about every community I am, or have been, a part of. Or perhaps that should just be called a ‘bloody contrary arse bias’?!


  3. Geekstress says:

    This is fantastic. Thank you so much for sharing! I honestly think these could explain a great deal of human behavior. For instance, I wonder if one of these would lend itself to why white people usually never see the racism against blacks. I know… not ADD related. But I found the list, over all, fascinating. Really made me think. You know?


    • geek- I’m glad you liked it. I was a little concerned about posting off the ADHD topic but it was so good and so relevant. Your point about racism is excellent and right on. thank you for commenting, it means a lot
      best wishes


    • rammkatze says:

      If I’m allowed to jump in quickly: I think some white people won’t see racism against blacks because they’re not racist so they fail to immediately recognize racism. Now I’m not saying it’s always the case, but I’m pretty sure I’m not discriminatory against blacks/POC, and just yesterday I was reading an article about a black woman complaining of racism on a novel that I knew, and the passages she quoted made me think “Well, this just sounds like he’s saying the black people have it figured out and us white people need to butt out once in a while”.


      • rammkatze says:

        My comment on racism was directed directed at Geekstress, but WordPress played a trick on me…

        Anyway, the competency bias rings a bell to me. Occasionally, someone will try to convince me of something REALLY stupid and I get really offended because they think I’m that stupid. Then I realize: they don’t think I’m stupid. They think they’re smarter. And that dumb scheme they’re trying to convince me of is about how fair their intelligence goes, and that’s really sad for them.
        Practical example: in my early 30’s, I was still struggling financially (ADHD and impulse buys) and everyone in my family, whenever I complained over the phone that I was struggling, just went ahead and wired me money against my will. It didn’t matter how much I yelled and cried that they needed to stop doing that because I needed to learn my lesson and I couldn’t possibly afford to pay them back, they ignored my wishes and kept enabling me. Then one day I changed my livinh country – and with that bank accounts. And I was struggling financially again and venting to my family about it, and my big sis asked me for my bank account info and I realized, it was my chance to grow as a person and deal with my finances, and I refused to give her the info. And then the next say she sent me a text message saying “hey, I was thinking: we have no idea how long a bank transfer to Austria takes, so give me your bank account and I’ll wire you some money, and then we’ll know how long it takes. Just in case we need to know that for something important one day.” ……. I kid you not, this happened. I replied to her “Well, I guess we’ll never know…”. And I got my finances (mostly) in order all alone.


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