Category Archives: marriage

ADHD and Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria

Sometimes you don’t see something that’s right in front of your eyes; at least I don’t. Rejection sensitivity dysphoria is a hot topic. It’s been found as another part of ADHD, like irritability (not in DSM, not part of the … Continue reading

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Taking It Easy? — ADHD Tip O the Day 996

An ADHD Strategy: When you need to get something done but can’t dig up the energy, see if you can find an easy way out. Here’s a bunch of quotes for today. “Your first step is just that: the first … Continue reading

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Constructive Arguing— ADHD Tip O Day 990

Constructive Arguing: Arguments are a normal and unavoidable part of almost all marriages (intimate relationships).  The trick is to make them productive instead of destructive, and to have them not too often nor too intensively, and to get over them … Continue reading

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Marriage- Part Three — ADHD Tip O the Day 988

With ADHD , everything is much harder, especially relationships. We disappoint, forget, let down. We get preoccupied, don’t finish, don’t get started.  We blurt out, do and say socially inappropriate things.  We run into things, knock things over, drop things. … Continue reading

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Marriage/Relationships? Part Two— ADHD Tip O the Day 986

Marriage part two Throughout this series, I use “marriage” “to stand for “marriage and/or relationships.” I understand that marriage is becoming increasingly rare. ADHD and marriage:  Marriage is hard.  With ADHD it’s much harder, especially for the non ADHD partner.  … Continue reading

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Many ADHD Links, Many Choices — ADHD Tip O the 981

  We ADHD ers have difficulty making choices. I’ve collected too many links, so I’m going to dump them now.  You pick and choose.  It’s up to you now. Doug Links:   Outgrow ADHD?   Ages and stages of ADHD … Continue reading

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Self Abuse Makes ADHD Worse — ADHD Tip O the Day 967

(Not that kind) With ADHD, we have many opportunities to feel shame.  And we often contribute to that be being harshly critical of ourselves.  And we often were subjected to shaming criticism as we were growing up  (and after), so … Continue reading

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Novel Published (in spite of ADHD)

Doug Puryear has just published his first novel (seventh book).  Alma Means Soul is the story of an extraordinary woman overcoming her childhood and of her journey towards wholeness.  A spiritual thread runs throughout.  Includes a section on El Camino … Continue reading

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FAQ about ADHD — ADHD Tip O the Day 958

I get many AHD questions from various web sites. Here are some answers (ie my opinions) with links. What can cure ADHD?  –  Only God. Does ADHD get worse with aging? – No, age just adds more problems. Am I … Continue reading

Posted in add, ADD problems or symptoms, ADD strategies, adhd, adhd and marriage, adhd controversies, ADHD problems, adhd science, ADHD strategies, adhd studies, controversies, controversy, controversy, diagnosis, dysfunctions, educate yourself, educate yourself, marriage, medication, medication, medicine, medicine, research, science, stimulants | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Keep It Short — ADHD Tip O the Day 955

My astute wife said the last ADHD post was too long.  So this one will be short. Strategy O the Day: Listen to your wife. doug Links: ADHD and Relationships ADHD and Relationships more Webinars Quotes O the Day: “The … Continue reading

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ADHD Emotions Part 3— ADHD Tip O the Day 923

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria as a part of  ADHD Do I have RSD?  I don’t know.  I reread the article, it says usually the crashes just last for hours, mine last a day or two. Still, I’m certainly overly sensitive and … Continue reading

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“It Just Got Away From Me” — ADHD Tip O the Day 891

ADHD is a booger Mon 2/17/2020 11:36 AM What I’m about to tell you is true. This is the way it really happened. You can’t make this stuff up. We were to leave for our trip on Thursday. We’d spend … Continue reading

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A Day with ADHD — ADHD Tip O the Day 869

What is a typical day with ADHD like? Here’s an example of how I spend my time: Trying to find my glasses:  20 minutes Trying to find my i phone, twice: 45 minutes Trying to find the thing that was … Continue reading

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A Bad Habit — ADHD Tip O the Day 829

I have a bad habit. No, it’s not sexual, no matter what you may have been imagining. Still, it’s too embarrassing to tell you. It’s just a bad habit which causes me some discomfort. I don’t like it. I’ve tried … Continue reading

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“You Don’t Listen to Me!” — ADHD Tip O the Day 816

Have you ever heard that? Miscommunication is a standard part of normal human life. So is the frustration with it.  But who ever said that ADHD is normal human life?  So we have a lot more of it. Feeling not … Continue reading

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Stuck again – ADHD Tip O the Day 814

Well here I am again, writing about being stuck, because I’ve been stuck. Many reasons, will spare you the excuses. In Mexico, on vacation, but still have a to do list of about six things that need doing pretty soon. … Continue reading

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Ouch! Hypersensitivity and ADHD – – – Tip O the Day 809

I know I am hypersensitive. Am I hypersensitive as a symptom of my ADHD? Or have my ADHD problems, including so many screw ups, just made my self-esteem fragile? So is the hypersensitivity an ADHD symptom or a consequence? I … Continue reading

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ADHD, Listening, Hearing, Oh,my — ADHD Tip O the Day 800

“You just don’t listen to me!” Have you ever heard that?  If you have, then does that mean you were listening? Yes, I was listening to you.  I could repeat every word you said.  But that doesn’t necessarily mean I … Continue reading

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ADHD and the Challenge of Relationships — ADHD Tip O the Day 795

If you think living with ADHD is a challenge, imagine what it’s like living with someone with ADHD. I started to add, “And imagine what it’s like to live with someone who is living with someone who is living with … Continue reading

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ADHD and Relationships – A Followup— ADHD Tip O the Day 768

What are ADHDers like?  What is it like to live with ADHD? What is it like to live with someone with ADHD? And why are relationships so difficult for ADHDers?  If you would like to understand, this article from Attitude … Continue reading

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Myths and What It’s Like to Live with ADHD — ADHD Tip O the Day 767

  Some People Still Do Not Understand ADHD There are climate change deniers, and flat earthers, and anti-vacine conspiracy theorists, and there are still many people who just do not understand ADHD. It does no good to get mad at … Continue reading

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ADHD and Relationships. Is it possible? — ADHD Tip O the Day 766

My long suffering wife  (very, very long) still gets annoyed sometimes when I do ADHD stuff.  For one example, of many, calling her to come help and then doing something to get ready while she’s standing there waiting. I’m trying … Continue reading

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Five Disconcerting Facts, Relevant To But Not Limited To ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 759

Disconcerting Facts: 1. Our decisions are made unconsciously, based on unconscious factors, mostly emotional.  After a decision is made, we think we “decide.”  Then we come up with “facts” to support our decision and make it appear to be rational. 2. … Continue reading

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Caring for Someone With ADHD (ambiguous title). Affection or caretaking?— ADHD Tip O the Day 742

Life Is Hard Life is hard.  Life with ADHD is harder.  Marriage is hard.  Marriage with ADHD is harder.  Being married to someone with ADHD is harder than I can even imagine. There are strategies that will make our life with … Continue reading

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Tips for Surviving with ADD ADHD — ADD Tip o the Day 730

What can we expect of ourselves, or of someone else, with ADHD? “Life can be hard, and with ADHD, it’s even harder.” “Some days, just surviving is a triumph.”             Doug Puryear The great cell … Continue reading

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Mother’s Day and ADHD, or, Living with an ADHDer —ADD Tip O the Day 715

With ADHD, Nothing Is Easy Hope you had a great Mother’s Day, whether you’re a mother or not.  You deserve it. I took Martha, the mother of my kids, and Laura, the mother of my grandson, to a nice restaurant.  … Continue reading

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Too Much, Too Much, Too Much — ADD Tip O the Day 670

Sometimes with my ADD ADHD, I can’t think straight, or even walk straight.  Sometimes it’s all too much. I was going to the library. It was a nice day. I was going to walk. Since I was going out, my … Continue reading

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ADD ADHD Talking To Myself — ADD Tip O the Day 648

Sometimes I talk to myself out loud, sometimes just inside my head. “You need to call Verizon.” I don’t want to call Verizon. “You need to call Verizon anyway.” It probably won’t do any good. “You need to try.” OK. Let me do … Continue reading

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Relationships, Including Marriage, and ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 636

For ease, I’ll talk about marriage  but this applies to all intimate relationships. Things they don’t tell you Marriage is hard work. Especially if one of you has ADD ADHD. Quote O the Day The only thing worse than being … Continue reading

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ADD ADHD and Marriage or Similar Relationships — ADD Tip O the Day 629

With ADD ADHD, Relationships Are Hard In older couples, the divorce rate is twice that of vanillas.  According to Melissa Orlov, the major problem is undiagnosed and untreated ADD ADHD. Quote O the Day: “You have to be a superwoman … Continue reading

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What Having ADD ADHD Is Like — ADD Tip O the Day 622

Living With ADD ADHD One of the painful things about having ADD ADHD is that people who don’t have it can’t understand what it’s like.  They may recognize some of the symptoms and problems and they may know what it’s … Continue reading

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ADD ADHD Poem —ADD Tip O the Day 593

Ode of an ADDer to a neat wife Please don’t put my stuff away. Please don’t move it, just let it lay. If I can’t see it, it doesn’t exist. I’ll forget to do something and we’ll both be pissed. … Continue reading

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Why Valentines Day Is important With ADD ADHD — ADD Tip O the Day 586

Valentines Day is February 14, this Saturday, that’s this coming Saturday, two days off, this Saturday, day after tomorrow. With ADD ADHD: 1. We forget all about it. 2. We think it’s a long way off and don’t buy a … Continue reading

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An Excess of Blessings From ADD ADHD – – – ADD Tip O the Day 582

Gifts, Benefits, and Blessings of ADD ADHD Have exhausted this topic for a moment. Got lots of good comments on both sides of the question.  Thank you. But – I am overly blessed with the gifts of creativity and wide … Continue reading

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Moving with ADD ADHD – – – ADD Tip O the Day 562

Are we having fun yet? Nothing tests a marriage quite like moving. Probably even more so with ADD ADHD. Strategies: 1. Recognize that your life is in turmoil. Your structure is gone. Your schedule is in disarray. You will barely … Continue reading

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ADD ADHD and Marriage?- Is It Possible??? —ADD Tip o the Day 545

 Marriage Experts I am not The Expert on ADD ADHD and marriage, that would be Melissa Orlov and Martha Puryear.  I do have some years in the field, but only from one side.  My expertise would be in How to … Continue reading

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My Wife Complains – – – ADD Tip O the Day 530

My wife told me this morning that I’m very difficult to  live with.      I have no reason to doubt her.  She’s  unhappy because I got lost walking in the neighborhood the other day and she was concerned about me. … Continue reading

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