I think we ADDers might use denial and avoidance more than the average person, though they aren’t integral parts of ADD.
I found a proofreader, and we reached an agreement, and I sent him the book to work on. We had an agreement about the fee, but it wasn’t specific. I was clear about what I wanted from him; that was good. But we didn’t get clear on how he was to do it. I was avoiding the chance of any conflict with him, and although I thought about it, I denied the need to clarify. So he revised the book, and it made more work for me than if we’d used a format where the changes he had made were clear. So I wound up having to use two screens, mine and his, and searching for the changes. Kind of slow and laborious. It turned out well though. He did a good job, and did some editing, which I hadn’t wanted but turned out quite helpful, and the cost was in the ballpark and reasonable. But the denial and avoidance made things a little harder for me.
Denial and avoidance are two of the primitive defenses, and among the least useful, since they do not deal with reality and problems ignored can get worse. However, if you are a marine ordered to charge a machine gun, denial is good- you can feel sorry for the guys on your left and your right, who are in danger of getting killed, poor fellows.
doug 
i am hoping that the book goes to the publisher this week.
