Do you think you have weak willpower, or none? It’s an ADD ADHD issue, for sure. Maybe you can do something about it.
From Nancie George:
“Expert Tips to Cultivate Willpower
Are you lacking in the willpower department? Our experts shared some ways you can flex your willpower muscle.
Think back on your accomplishments. “First, notice the times in your life where you’ve actually displayed the ability to tolerate discomfort for a longer term good that you deemed worthwhile,” says Bea.
Once you can get a list of those accomplishments together, then you’ll see that willpower might be something you had all along but didn’t know it. One simple example would be not scratching an itch. “That’s small, but it’s a way to display to yourself that you’re able to tolerate discomfort,” says Bea.
Remember your strategy. Bea says that the number one reason people don’t reach their goals is because they lack a good strategy. “Try to understand, for the many things that one has accomplished it wasn’t just willpower. There may have been a strategy that one employed,” he explains.
Cut yourself some slack. Carmichael believes that willpower is a finite resource. “We only have so much self-discipline available at any given point in time,” she says. Because we may not be able to both start a strict diet and quit smoking at the same time, it’s wise to use willpower strategically.
“For example, if you’re going to a cocktail party and the goal is to avoid overindulging on hors d’oeuvres, give yourself leeway in some other department — allow yourself to take a taxi to the party instead of the subway, skip the towering stilettos, or plan to sleep in late the next morning,” she says.
Offer incentives. In order to achieve your goal, offer yourself an incentive for your discomfort. For example, if you’re trying to quit smoking, offer yourself a financial incentive. For each day that you don’t smoke, compensate yourself for that discomfort. As a longer-term incentive, pick out something you really want and use that “discomfort money” to buy it.
This employs the use of a strategy because you’re compensating yourself for your discomfort. You have incentive because you want that financial reward, and if you fail then you have the same incentive the next day to go for it again.
Get active. Carmichael says that yoga and meditation are excellent tools to increase willpower. “Yoga involves mindful awareness of many things, sometimes including minor physical discomfort — anyone had their quads burn during warrior pose before?” she says.
“Learning to greet minor discomfort as a welcome sign of growth, while keeping your mind focused on the pose, helps build willpower and strength of mind.”
Makeover Your Goals
If you really want to work on cultivating willpower, take a second look at your goals. Makeover your goals so you’re more likely to reach them. First, keep goals small, measurable, and systematic. Remember to celebrate small successes, and ditch disqualifying self-talk like “I can’t,” “I’ll never,” and “It’s impossible.” “
Bonus Tip O the Day:
Words have powerful effects. Eliminate these destructive words from your vocabulary, especially your internal dialog, especially if you have ADD ADHD:
“should,”, “have to,” “ought to.”
The new book, The Bully, seems about done. But it’s seemed that way before.