Do you think you have weak willpower, or none? It’s an ADD ADHD issue, for sure. Maybe you can do something about it.
From Nancie George:
“Expert Tips to Cultivate Willpower
Are you lacking in the willpower department? Our experts shared some ways you can flex your willpower muscle.
Think back on your accomplishments. “First, notice the times in your life where you’ve actually displayed the ability to tolerate discomfort for a longer term good that you deemed worthwhile,” says Bea.
Once you can get a list of those accomplishments together, then you’ll see that willpower might be something you had all along but didn’t know it. One simple example would be not scratching an itch. “That’s small, but it’s a way to display to yourself that you’re able to tolerate discomfort,” says Bea.
Remember your strategy. Bea says that the number one reason people don’t reach their goals is because they lack a good strategy. “Try to understand, for the many things that one has accomplished it wasn’t just willpower. There may have been a strategy that one employed,” he explains.
Cut yourself some slack. Carmichael believes that willpower is a finite resource. “We only have so much self-discipline available at any given point in time,” she says. Because we may not be able to both start a strict diet and quit smoking at the same time, it’s wise to use willpower strategically.
“For example, if you’re going to a cocktail party and the goal is to avoid overindulging on hors d’oeuvres, give yourself leeway in some other department — allow yourself to take a taxi to the party instead of the subway, skip the towering stilettos, or plan to sleep in late the next morning,” she says.
Offer incentives. In order to achieve your goal, offer yourself an incentive for your discomfort. For example, if you’re trying to quit smoking, offer yourself a financial incentive. For each day that you don’t smoke, compensate yourself for that discomfort. As a longer-term incentive, pick out something you really want and use that “discomfort money” to buy it.
This employs the use of a strategy because you’re compensating yourself for your discomfort. You have incentive because you want that financial reward, and if you fail then you have the same incentive the next day to go for it again.
Get active. Carmichael says that yoga and meditation are excellent tools to increase willpower. “Yoga involves mindful awareness of many things, sometimes including minor physical discomfort — anyone had their quads burn during warrior pose before?” she says.
“Learning to greet minor discomfort as a welcome sign of growth, while keeping your mind focused on the pose, helps build willpower and strength of mind.”
Makeover Your Goals
If you really want to work on cultivating willpower, take a second look at your goals. Makeover your goals so you’re more likely to reach them. First, keep goals small, measurable, and systematic. Remember to celebrate small successes, and ditch disqualifying self-talk like “I can’t,” “I’ll never,” and “It’s impossible.” “
doug
Bonus Links
More tips on willpower — The Link for the Whole Article Above
Bonus Tip O the Day:
Words have powerful effects. Eliminate these destructive words from your vocabulary, especially your internal dialog, especially if you have ADD ADHD:
“should,”, “have to,” “ought to.”
Final Note:
The new book, The Bully, seems about done. But it’s seemed that way before.
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I’m looking forward to your new book, Doug! I hope it’ll be available on the german amazon very soon, because my kindle only accepts purchases from Amazon.de (it was no problem with your other books, but those had been around for a while). Thank you for the good post on willpower!
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ram – i hope it will be on de, should be. it is about bullying, but can be read as about growing up with ADD ADHD. hope in jan, more likely in feb
thanks
dou
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Thank you Doug!
That is a great idea about two separate specific get up times! I think that might help a whole lot!
Thank you for the nice comment on my photos too!
All the best,
Scott
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Thanks Doug!
This is a good one!
I’m currently trying to get in the habit of getting up at a certain time, except Saturdays and Sundays. I’ve noticed in the past that, if I get up earlier, lots of other things in my life start to fall into place. It is sort of like getting up is a keystone habit for me. But it is a tough one for me too, being self employed, playing music until late at night often enough to mess up a schedule, and other things that just seem to derail me. At least I know it is a keystone habit and I remember what it feels like when I’ve been getting up consistently. That helps. I’m always looking for other helpful ideas too… This list has some good ideas. Thank you!
All the best,
Scott
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Scott –
maybe its not realistic to expect the same get up time if you’ve been up late, sleep is important. would it work if you picked a specific get up time for those times and another for the regular times?
thank you for your kind and useful comments
doug
ps your slides are very impressive.
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