I did a small nonrequired unrequested kindness for my wife this morning, opening a container that I knew she was going to use later. She was unaware of this. I was being thoughtful. Unfortunately, this was unusual enough that I noticed it. I do a lot of things for her, but they tend to be things we have agreed are my job or things she has requested. This was just being thoughtful, noticing something and thinking of her. I do think of her a lot, but not so often of things I could do for her.
I was writing in draft 13 of the book yesterday, about carelessness. In a way carelessness might be the opposite of thougtfulness. I might be thoughtful more often, and less careless, if I was more aware, which I am practicing on.
It made me think of earlier times, before I had the strategies to cope with my ADD, when it seemed like most days I was just hanging on by my fingernails, preoccupied with my stresses and with all the things I need to do, feeling prety overwhelmed. I certainly didn’t have space for noticing little thoughtful things I could do; I was preoccupied with myself and my survival. My life is better now, and still improving. I am developing more strategies to cope and getting better at them. Hopefully I will be more thoughtful.