Category Archives: Uncategorized

Distraction — ADD Tip o the day 135

My wife and I had a running disagreement about my colleges grades, she thought I was putting myself down and saying they were worse than they were.  So I ordered my transcript.  I didn’t know that I had ADD when … Continue reading

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Your life can be better — ADD Tip o the day 134

My daughter just told me that one of my reviewers had commented to her that he felt sorry for me after reading the book.  That’s one of the things I was afraid of and I tried to address it and … Continue reading

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Forgiving part 2 — ADD Tip o the day 133

We humans are not programmed for forgiving, it is one of the hardest things to do.  It may be that we need to forgive ourselves first if we are to learn how to forgive others.  If we are struggling with … Continue reading

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Forgiving – — ADD Tip o the day 132

I have a lot of grudges and resentments – slights, hurts, disappointments and things people “did to me”.  They’re really silly, we all know they harm no one except me. I have lot of regrets, things I did or didn’t … Continue reading

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Criticism and ADD — ADD Tip o the day 131

When I’m getting criticised, I tend to wall off and not hear well.  Even more so if I’m getting pressured to do something, which often feels like criticism, as does plain helpful suggestions or advice. Since I have ADD, or … Continue reading

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Feedback loops — ADD Tip o the day 130

Most everything seems to work in feedback loops.  If we get depressed, we don’t feel like doing anything.  If we don’t do things we get more depressed, which makes it harder to do things, which makes us more depressed. If … Continue reading

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Why I don’t get it done – Part 2 — ADD Tip o the day 129

So I’m doing something I enjoy, or maybe not, maybe I’m just killing time, instead of doing what I need to do.  Reasons: 1. I’m not sure I can do it – it looks too big, too hard, too complicated.  … Continue reading

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Why I don’t get it done — ADD Tip o the day 128

Why do I keep doing what I want to do instead of what I need to do?  I do the easy enjoyable fun things while the things I need to do pile up over my head.  The more they pile … Continue reading

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Listen — ADD Tip o the day 127

Last night I had a great idea for todays blog.  I had the thought that I should write it down, but I knew that I would remember it this morning.  Not! Why do I have to learn over and over … Continue reading

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Criticism — ADD Tip o the day 126

When we are criticized we usually take one of two approaches, either assess the information and see how we might benefit from it, or else, attack the source. The book has been blessed by many reviewers.  Two reviewers did not … Continue reading

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Like father, like son — ADD Tip o the day 125

There are many stories of parents bringing their son in for evaluation, and when his ADD is diagnosed and ADD or ADHD is explained to them, the father is amazed to realize that he has it too. I estimate a … Continue reading

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Quien mucho abarca, poco aprieta. —ADD Tip o the Day 124

The person who embraces a lot doesn’t squeeze much.  This isn’t talking about hugging.  I have this afternoon off, so I’m writing the post that I will publish tomorrow. This will get done.  Then I will do something else, but … Continue reading

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Stupid? —- ADD Tip o the Day 123

Am I stupid to keep putting these posts up on the blog? Was I stupid to buy some stocks early this morning when the market dropped instead of this afternoon when it was even lower?   Or for knocking over … Continue reading

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A Mess — ADD Tip o the Day 122

The man said, ” I just hate housework. I really hate it!  You make the beds and wash the dishes and two or three weeks later you just have to do it all over again.” Messes affect us.  They lower … Continue reading

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Clumsy?— ADD Tip o the Day 121

We were enjoying a nice lunch, when I reached for the butter. I was very aware of the danger of knocking over the wine, so I was very careful how I reached.  So I knocked over the water.   At … Continue reading

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Enough is enough! — ADD Tip o the day 120

For those few of you who may not have heard yet – tho I shouted as loud as I could- the book is at the publisher!  Draft 23. draft 21 was still awful, hard to believe after all those revisions.  22 was incorporating the … Continue reading

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Plug Away — ADD Tip o the day 119

I wanted to submit the book to the publisher yesterday, Monday.  I was close to ready, so I shifted into a pressure rush mode.  If we’re struggling to cope with ADD or ADHD, that mode is familiar to us but … Continue reading

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strategies — ADD Tip o the day 118

The book is about strategies for coping with ADD or ADHD, to make our lives better. Those without ADD or ADHD don’t understand what it’s like living this way, but those living with us do know what it’s like living … Continue reading

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Pressure (heed thine own advice) — ADD Tip o the day 117

I got the draft back from the proofreader. Because of my avoidance and denial it was in a form that made it hard to work with.  I had wanted to send the book to the publisher by the end of … Continue reading

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denial and avoidance — ADD Tip o the day 116

I think we ADDers might use denial and avoidance more than the average person, though they aren’t integral parts of ADD.   I found a proofreader, and we reached an agreement, and I sent him the book to work on. … Continue reading

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Denial — ADD Tip o the day 115

A while back I got an email from napster, where I had a bunch of music I’d bought. It said something about something they were going to change and something I needed to do to keep from losing my songs.  I … Continue reading

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Try harder! —– Tip o the day 114

If we are coping with ADD or ADHD, we have heard that all our life:”You need to try harder!” We learned to say it to ourself. Problem is, it doesn’t work.  What we need is to try smarter, which with … Continue reading

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Balance — ADD TIp of the day 113

One of the measures of mental health is balance, not too much of this or of that.  We who try to cope with ADD or ADHD have trouble with this.  We have to set aside what we would like to … Continue reading

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Problem, Strategy, Rule, Habit? ADD Tip o the day 112

I often write checks on  my wife’s checkbook.  I often make errors in arithmetic.  This causes her headaches.  So her strategy was to ask me to use the calculator.  I agreed.  Next I would need to make this a rule and … Continue reading

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Worst case — ADD Tip o the day 111

When I’m worried about something I have several strategies.  One of them is to ask, “What’s the worst thing that could happen?”  Then I ask, “And what would I do then?” And then I make a plan.  So I am … Continue reading

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Memory — ADD Tip o the day 110

Because we have very poor memories, we need to remember.  What??!! We need to remember that we have very poor memories and that therefore we need to write it down, to make lists.  But because we won’t remember where we … Continue reading

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Help — ADD Tip o the day 109

As you may know, I am trying to cope with ADD.  I need a lot of help.  For example, when I pack for a trip, I always forget something, razor, or socks, or medicine or something.  So my wife helps … Continue reading

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Expectations — ADD Tip o the day 108

I have a lot of things I think I will get done today. I will not.  Writing them all down is a good idea; then I need to make a shorter list, five or less.  Then I need to pick … Continue reading

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Just stop! — ADD Tip o the day 107

It started off as one of those days, early, when I stubbed my toe on a middle of the night bathroom run.  Then the paper hadn’t come yet.  And I’d forgotten to set up my breakfast things the night before. … Continue reading

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Write it down — ADD Tip o the day 106

A lot of negative things had piled up, all pretty minor thank God, but I was feeling kind of down.  I was moping around grumbling to myself and not really enjoying it.  So I sat down and made a list … Continue reading

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Where are my glasses? — Add Tip o the day 105

Couldn’t find my glasses. I take them off to use the computer, and had been using two computers, so I looked carefully in each place.  Carefully because sometimes I don’t see things.  And I say that if I don’t have … Continue reading

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Vulnerable — ADD tip o the day 104

“steaming” is a poker term.  When you got a really good hand, and you played it perfectly, and then you lost a big pot because some bozo  made an incredibly lucky draw and beat you, you are likely to be … Continue reading

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Being positive — ADD Tip o the day 103

Just read a great comment from Lucy, who read tip 101 as self flagellation and over pressuring myself.  As I just wrote in 102, we often don’t see ourself, or what we are doing, or hear what we are saying.  I … Continue reading

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We don’t see it — ADD Tip o the day 102

I just finished draft 17 for the book.  I’d thought it would need a little tweaking, maybe a typo here and there, maybe a little polishing at a few points.  Wrong! A lot of tweaking, and several sections needed complete … Continue reading

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Focus — ADD Tip o the day 101

I just did it again!-hit the big backspace key when I meant to hit the little delete key.  Erased what I wanted to keep and still have what I wanted to erase.  Why do I keep doing that? Because I’m not … Continue reading

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Stress — ADD Tip o the day 100

What do we do when things get stressful?  We focus on the problems and forget to do the things that help us handle stress! Our first week of vacation was a little rough; some things weren’t going well.  After a while, … Continue reading

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The power of lists — ADD Tip o the day 99

I like lists.  I need lists.  I make lists all day long. Couldn’t function without them.  It’s not just the list, having it as a guideline and for structure, but it’s also in the making of the list.  To make … Continue reading

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Pecking away —ADD Tip o the day 98

I am not getting to do as much  on the book as I would like right now, but I am pecking away.  I do a little bit every day and it is amazing how it adds up.  So one small … Continue reading

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ADD in women — ADD Tip o the day 97

ADD or ADHD starts in childhood.  Boys tend to have the hyperactive type, so they get diagnosed or punished or expelled, whatever, they get noticed.  Girls tend to have the “inattentive” type, they just sit there and daydream and don’t … Continue reading

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Too much is never enough — ADD Tip o the day 96

I quickly got into the  habit of buying for breakfast two croissant and one pain raisin, which is kind of like a cinnamon roll but more so.  This was obviously too much; I was leaving the table feeling overstuffed and … Continue reading

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Know your limitations — ADD Tip o the day 95

I think that I’m a good writer.  It’is probably useful to me to think that, but unfortunately, I know, or perhaps better, I know that unfortunately, it is not true.  I am a lousy writer.  I am in the middle … Continue reading

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Time management — ADD Tip o the day 94

You heard about the guy who was lousy at time management.  His friends recommended a good course to him, but he didn’t have time to take it. Well, if he has ADD or ADHD, he needs some coping strategies.  I … Continue reading

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A new hero — ADD Tip o the day 93

I have a new hero!  Did you ever spend time chasing pickles around in a jar with a fork, or worse yet, a knife, trying to spear one of the little buggers, or somehow get one up and out? Did … Continue reading

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Stay ahead — ADD Tip o the day 92

The other day I noticed I was quite a bit ahead on my to do things, and how good it felt, comfortable and relaxed. The next day was the opposite, I was behind and feeling kind of pressured and overloaded.  … Continue reading

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Time management? —- ADD Tip o the day 91

We tend to underestimate the time it will take to do something or to get somewhere.  We are not good at it.  One of the several reasons is that we estimate based on the assumption that there will be no … Continue reading

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Solving problems —- ADD Tip o the day 90

I bleive that for every problem there is a solution, although I know that that’s not actually true.  but i think it’s mostly true, and I think that it’s the best thing to believe, even if it’s not true.  Because … Continue reading

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Careful — ADD Tip o the day 89

I find that I am careful sometimes.  We toured a glass factory and then were led into an incredible showroom filled with art pieces, very expensive.  I had on a back pack and realized that it was not safe, i … Continue reading

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Asking directions — ADD Tip o the day 88

I had to ask for directions several times yesterday.  That is hard for men to do.  First, we are supposed to be on top of everything and show no weakness.  Second, research, which I didn’t understand, shows that some part … Continue reading

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coordinated, not — ADD Tip o the day 87

Last night I reached for the wine glass, and instead of grasping it, I knocked it over.  Red wine on the white tablecloth, tho I guess it didn’t matter too much since I’d already spilled a lot of pizza sauce … Continue reading

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Check, check, check —- ADD Tip o the day 86

Left my blue sports jacket hanging on the back of the chair at the restaurant at JFK airport.  It was hot and stuffy there,  no air conditioning on in the airport.  Leaving the jacket there wasn’t so bad except my … Continue reading

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